R.I.P

OUT

2008-02-11T13:47:00.002+08:00

in and out of the A&E and decided to wrap up this blog space. Moved over to this cool place. See you there! (update your links!)

>>> http://alaskie.wordpress.com/ <<<

Be sure to drop by www.technorati.com to register your blog, tag me, or say hi!

im sorry

2008-01-09T02:38:00.000+08:00

Ive written in my previous entry would be my last. However, I will make this piece an exception.

It may seem cruel on my part - for me to turn cold on you as you knocked at my door. I'm torn apart as I realised that closing the door was the right thing I had to do. I never did expect anything as heart wrenching as this would befall on me; but I'm glad I've faced it and handled it with maturity and patience. (by the grace of God).

Please try to understand that this was never my intention to cause you any pain,hurt or suffering. My apology might seem inadequate and for you; it may fail to address the issue. I can only offer you my deepest in this song. Lyrics as below.

Song Title: Cherish This Love

Sorry for making you cry.
For turning away as you walk on by.
But baby I need to be strong and I need to move on with my life.
You know it's not that I don't care, so don't make me feel bad, it's not fair
Baby you know all the reasons I made my decisions in life.

Now a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do, and a boy has to become a man.
And I'm sorry for saying but it's love that I need and that love I just can't get from you.

(Chorus)
It's funny how things turn around.
One day I am lost then I'm found.
It happened so fast I knew it would last from the first time I first looked in your eyes.
Although it's so soon this I know, I'll never be on my own.
Dreams turn to tears, she buries my fears.
And I will cherish this love ever more.

You know it's not easy to do, turning my back on me and you.
But baby I need someone there who will love me and care for my life.
Smiles they turned into tears and all of my dreams, they all disappeared.
Baby this cannot be right so I'll turn down the light on our love.

Now a boy's gotta do what a boy's gotta do and a girl has to do what she can.
And I'm sorry for saying but it's love that I need and that love I just can't get from you.

(Chorus)

And everything that could gone wrong, has gone wrong at some time.
Now I can see the light, it was love at first sight.
And I'm not gonna let this girl go.

(Chorus)

Yes I will with you.
_____________________

The following are "comfort" verses - always reminding us that we are covered under His beautiful wings.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. - James 1:2-4

For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. - Matt 6:32-33

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. - Jeremiah 29:11

Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your plans will succeed. - Proverbs 16:2-4

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. -Romans 8:28

*many thanks to Abba, S-Han, S-Ning, Helen, Shahaizan & Evelyn for your questions and encouragement. I really do appreciate it*

Dear Father, I am leaving my bleeding emotions at your feet as I pray for wisdom and direction. In Jesus name I ask. Amen.

viva forever

2007-11-10T00:06:00.000+08:00

viva forever. fitting to the mood and its to open what i am going to announce.

alright. a blog is like a door; once opened, it has to close before another door reveals itself.

thank you for the all inspiration in the past. w/o that i wouldnt have been able to write anything.

as the nuance of childhood has eluded me, I find no joy in writing, share or to inspire anymore. Writing in itself has no meaning, no weight... no life.

im seeking God's refuge and hopefully, he'd guide me along. no biggie for God to do His magic.

the address will still be kept because i foresee it will serve me a purpose in the future.

thank you blog for accompanying me all this time; celebrating my ups and downs.

thank you readers whoever you are. may god bless you.

i wunt come back to this place unless, my professor needs me to start a blog .....again.... yup.

goodbye.

all my love, forever and a day....
alaskie nly.

P/s: Yusheng, im sorry i cannot write here anymore. But you can email or write to me, either way i will still reply faithfully. =)

exhuasted

2007-11-05T02:00:00.000+08:00

i.am.usually.not.a.one-liner.writer.

i.am.exhuasted.

i.think.my.subconciousness.controls.me.

my.body.is.the.transportation.for.my.brain.

oh.f**k.i.killed.me.

god.save.~~america~~alaska.

heart gil ofarim trivial

2007-10-28T12:18:00.000+08:00

musing over gil's goodbye song on his first album (as i was humming it.... have to say goodbye...dadadada please dunt ask me why.. dadadadada.. when the love is gone...two hearts are broken...i cannot help it my love still alive....) i googled [gil doron ofarim] surprisingly i still remembered his name! I found this:

I COULDNT BELIEVE MY EYES! and so you know..... i had a good laugh!!!! (and knocking over all my books on the floor) Put in a younger photo of them to make that comparision. Hell! Tal looked like a drunkard-drug-addict! Gil's sooo HWAT! *sizzles* See below. i was sooooo into those messy-hair-guitar-playing-rockstarish look. and he hails from Germany! maybe this would be the only SINGLE reason why i shd go on BSM to germany (steph would be thrilled to hear this). Mission to find GIL!

i knew he was in Zoo Army with his brother Tal after he released 2 solo albums back in those days... alright (at least 9 years ago) Gil LOOOKED SO BLOODIE HWAT!!!!!!!! [i had to say it the second time to make my point] okay... in short they looked: DIFFERENT. as i pored over their pictures. sweet memories came to mind.

hee~i got to hug Gil once; right the friendly kind. and then i went crazy over JPG's collogne coz he *smelt* soooo good in it. AND then the rocker style became an "in" thingy. wrote his name [gil] and drew the dot of the "i"s with a star instead of the old fashioned [.] the times we would hunt out at the glass hotel [now known as the holiday inn] hoping to catch him. [this spells stalker!] Recorded EVERY freaking TV interview he had on MTV and local TV. but i loved every single bit of those days. something which i did was considered a TABOO and stupid crazy. hah! and i mean really stupid stupid! I'd murder myself i ever did that again. EVER!

their sound is matured and with loads of metal and rock in it. it wouldnt be surprising because Metallica and Nirvana were the brothers' source of musical inspiration when they were younger. Yup Guns & Roses played a part too. So here's Zoo Army. They're german but sings in English and i doubt you'd find their album here in singapore. So i shall remind steph to get their album for me next year! haha! for more info: http://www.zooarmy.de/

i leave you with this.... and as corny i may sound. i still *heart heart heart* Gil =D

weep not for the memories

2007-10-20T00:14:00.000+08:00

"yea, im excited but im also terrified of what is going to come. it's a little overwhelming"

some extracts from her personal diary to remind herelf that she's still a little girl challenging herself & her life

tuesday.20march2007.1.27am

...mocked, slammed and hurt by someone who's words were always kind, motivating and happy...i hate you for what you've said..i'd never forgive you and id make you regret your decision...

thursday.10may2007.6.14pm. on my desk in my room

...seems like yesterday when I booked the tickets. Now I'm really going to leave for 3-4 months. it'd be along long time huh. urgh tonight...packing night...

friday.1june2007.11.20pm.on my bed in my shenzhen apt

....this day will officially mark my 3rd week here and working in kaifa. just back and showered. Ben & Winna took us to dinner. there we chatted about each other's background. was nice. warm kind of nice. i'm really thankful and blessed to know people like them.

monday.6august2007.11.00am.HKIA gate 4 boarding area.writing in my lap.

...interesting how time flies. waiting for my flight in a hour's time...hope that my arrival/visit will cheer them up. As im sitting here writing with my purple marker, i really feel like sleeping. crap. behind me, i hear chinese people. their crazy accent never fail to amuse me...

...for the last 2 days, i've spent time with gloria. hanging out, chatting and doing things which we missed out on before. honestly, i wouldnt be much fun without her...

wednesday.8august2007.1145am.MaoYuan Hotel in Xiang Yun.on my desk

...yusheng, cathy and haonan are sitting on my bed reading my green schedule/note book..

wednesday.8august2007.night.MaoYuan Hotel in Xiang Yun.on my bed

...yusheng and haonan brought me to this wet market earlier and after took a brisk walk to Xiang Yun old town/Yunnan Yi where I paid for the entrance fee worth 40 yuan. paid for the kids as well. where the Flying Tiger's old airbase resided. Dropped by a shop selling all sorts of Moutai...

thursday.9august2007.9.53pm.MaoYuan Hotel in Xiang Yun.on my bed

...we took a small van to Xiangbi. Met Yun Juan & Yun Chen. To me, it was extremely emotional to see the both of them again. her grandma still remembers me. that felt really warm. After meeting Yun Chen, we picked up where we left off. the way he smiled and giggled. he told me he wanted to go to to Qing Hua University and having achieved 4th in his class brought a huge huge smile on my face. I was speechlessly filled with joy...

sunday.12august2007.11.05pm.Yunniang Hotel Kunming. on my bed

...watching tv while writing this. time seemed to pass so fast. felt as if my tour just started. im glad that i was received with such warm hospitality from the kids and their parents. esp from the humble families in xiangbi. this past week's left me feeling refreshed and blessed. to be able to see my kids again. that matters alot to me. tonight, im in kunming but tml id be flying back to Hong Kong to meet the girls and start off my next leg of traveling...

...edwin called and said he couldnt accompany me for the evening/send me off. actually it's really alright. this meant that i had the chance to go out by myself and roam the streets of kunming alone... and that's what i did...

...Ive learnt. given a situation if you succumb to difficulty and becaome afraid of it, giving up without trying, you will never learn anything. Nothing is too scary or impossible to attempt. If you are willing to try, many opportunities await you. Im not risking myself to danger. Trust in the Lord and be aware of your surroundings. Never assume that you are always safe. Check and double check especially in China. I've enjoyed my time here and hopefully the fire in me will keep burning throughout this busy busy semester...

gratitude & a slight tinch of procrastination

2007-10-13T23:24:00.000+08:00

procrastinating. hence, i snapped some gratitude photos with my trusty camera. here goes

the princess and the frog: one of the few wholesome fairytales i believe in

i realised there isnt a need to buy a new mug cos i had one sitting in my kitchen cupboard. bought a mug from Pammie 2 years ago for her LTB project to raise funds for an old folks home. beautifully drawn by an elder whom i never met.

got him in Xiang Yun. HA! you must be wondering "of all places, fancy picking him up in a remote town in X.Y." he was a darling cos he kept me company for 5 days in my hotel room. ever since i brought him home, he's been on my desk.

this is from Yun Chen. the little boy with big dreams. my motivation as well.

the siblings got this for me while they were in Hong Kong's Disneyland and me slogging away at work in Shenzhen.

finally; postcards from my dear students. im still a "pen and paper" person.

So what cheers you up? What are you grateful for?

laughter & friends

2007-10-12T23:58:00.000+08:00

without friends (and my hamsters & God), i guess i never would have survived any (this) stressful period.

these people keep me sane. thank you.

laughter's a wonderful present.

late nights

2007-10-11T01:43:00.000+08:00

Its 1.49am. I hate doing ppts. done 5 so far this sem. dreaming every second that id morph into Sydney Bristow and Vaughn will take me away.

i miss the shenzhen gang.

girls date for free

2007-10-02T12:40:00.000+08:00

Recently, ive been bogged down by school work to the point I find no joy in blogging but read off stuff people write about their lives; you know the kind of sh*t stuff people write. Pretty morbid and depressing really.

I was introduced to this really cool idea of dating that comes in a movie package. While browsing the site several thoughts came to mind.

Btw, Im typing this is Marketing Research Class.

Okay for the benefit of everyone, id give a gist of what this ‘cool-dating-thing’ is about.

Right. You sign up for a particular movie and wait for the people at the HQ to match you with a suitable date.

Once the match is set, you go to the movies! Of course without knowledge of who your partner is. (if you are female you’d be a male. For my gay friends, I’m not sure whether they provide that service. Heee)

Ha! I began to conceive in my mind some idiotic images. Think about some of the guys you are ‘destined’ to meet……

Scenario 1

You meet Mr. Dig-nose-and-shakes-your-hand

Scenario 2

You meet Mr. Seducer-sleep-over-at-my-place-later

Scenario 3

You meet Mr. Smell-bad-never-bathe-in-weeks

Scenario 4

You meet Mr. Geek-screaming-books-rule

Scenario 5

You meet Mr. Stalker-I-just-cannot-lose-sight-of-you

Scenario 6

And perhaps after stepping on so many stumps, you’ve finally hit the nail and meet Mr. Head-over-heels-guy/girl-of-your-dreams. (Michael Vartan’s MY dream guy; hence below)

Anyways, there are 3 different types of membership. Classic (ladies join for free only), Gold and Platinum. The last 2 memberships are for a fee.

For the glory of ole singlehood; now guys pay to go out with you! And if you girls wanna have some fun for free, go for the classic one! Heee~ (according to the org., the tickets are paid by the guys)

HAHA! Sounds exciting? The perks of being single! Whooooohooooo~ But bear in mind the 6 minus 1 scenarios above. How do you play the dating game then? How do you know you've kissed the right toad? *winks*

all images are for self entertainment only: gettyimages copyright. i am not doing a writeup on them. my 2 cents worth.
______________________________________

After Last Night.......

I realised some ang mos are pleasing to the eyes or sugar to the ears but are labelled as “one-night-stands” ONLY. Nearly wanted to say F***able; I must remain civil Oppx =)

Will have post more when steff sends me the pictures.

Falling in love

2007-09-21T21:45:00.000+08:00

Hurray!! its been umpteen years since i watched this drama "Falling in Love". one of my childhood favourites. anyways. kudos to jessica liu for playing her role so well =) and today, Channel 8 broadcasted their last episode. Ever since i found out that this show was on air last week, ive been following it faithfully. sitting down in front of the tv sure brought back lots of memories! which reminded me never to give up and hold out till the very last. so my love, be brave!

我要做郑紫惠！象她那样的不屈服，一直在守候着那个他。我一定可做到的！
如果眼泪若下没关系，不放弃就好了！每天要带着笑容过每一天！呵呵=）

ethics and thoughts

2007-09-16T00:25:00.000+08:00

i met two different friends last week.

one was from overseas. well, i wouldnt call him "friend" because we officially met for the first time last week. so and i brought him to have a bowl of ice shavings. and i was really proud that i managed to convince him to order durian cos i hated durians; which he thought tasted like sweet potato. the whole while, there wasnt any awkward pauses. we just talked and talked. i guess he was interested to know about the culture in Singapore. and being a localie it's my job to fill him in. it was great meeting him. another friend on my list. a new friend.

the other one was a long-time friend. honestly, we hadnt met for like 4 months. it was just before the summer break. anyways. yea, we met up chatted. it was liberating and i realised something was different. it didnt felt like it was before. that connection wasnt there anymore. however, it was all good. that im glad he moved on with his life. and i did finally. I began to thank God the miracles He brought to my friends. How He could heal broken hearts like a swift of a wand. And so I believed that broken hearts can mend. time and time, it proved right.

last week was a learning week. i had the taste of busyness and in all, there wasnt a moment i forgot to breathe and pray. i had the urge to call a friend; to tell that I was finally ready and i was so stupid to let slipped away. then again, God made plans. if this was part of it, it would happen wouldn't it?

bottomline: its funny how life challenges you. and how the connection with friends could change if you let it. its really scary actually. if you didnt bother, didnt lift that finger. it could be the biggest mistake one would ever make.

___________________________

during ethics class last friday, we watched a film: Enron: the smartest guys in the room. I realised how important it was to be ethical. however i disagree that SMU made it a compulsory course and one that has a final paper. BS really. if there isnt a right or wrong; HOW the hell would professors grade our paper?! Its like civil and moral education! right, since i have to PASS this paper, i have to be an ethical angel even tho' i thought otherwise? something is really wrong here.

moving on, i felt really sad that people could make decisions like that. at the expense of the public's savings, jobs and perhaps dreams! what is money to them? How could a group of top executives managed to wired money under everybody's noses, deceived everyone and pull the final plug. so many people lost their jobs and pension funds in one day! how could they?

hence with intelligence melted with greed can be a horrible horrible conoctation. these is what i call; deadly human beings.

Macau

2007-09-04T20:20:00.000+08:00

No one knows this, but i've always been a fan of Macau's Architecture since I was young (and I mean at least 10 years ago) Finally... we had the opportunity to take on MACAU!

Needlessly to say, I was really thrilled to be in Macau with S-han, S-ning and Helen :) Hey~* We did this free and easy, walking around with a Korean guide book in hand. Awesome and hands up for us girls! I've wiki-ed the places we went to so there's something for all of us to learn from Macau.

The Jet-Boat Ride

You can get tickets at the Shun Tak Tower. They have lots of departure timing so not to worry

Senado Square

Mainly colourful typical Iberian town square at the heart of the city. The Senado Square, or Senate Square (Portuguese: Largo do Senado); is a paved area in the centre of the former Portuguese colony of Macau, in China, enclosed by the building of the Leal Senado, the General Post Office, and St. Dominic’s Church. The square is paved in the tradicional Portuguese pavement. It is part of the UNESCO World Heritage Site "Historic Centre of Macau".

Milk Pudding (Shuang Pi Nai)

Helen founded this little place near Senado Square. The pudding's okay but I thought I ate better ones =) and unfortunately, helen didnt like it :x

The Cathedral of Saint Paul

ZOMG~* I touched the architecture!

The Cathedral of Saint Paul — informally known as Saint Paul's Cathedral — was a Portuguese 16th-century cathedral in the former Portuguese colony of Macau, now in the People's Republic of China, dedicated to Saint Paul the Apostle of Jesus. Today, its ruins are one of Macau's most famous landmarks.

Built from 1582 to 1602 by the Jesuits, the Cathedral was the largest Catholic church in Asia at the time, and the royalty of Europe vied with each other to bestow upon the Cathedral the best gifts. With the decline in importance of Macau, which was overtaken as the main port for the Pearl River Delta by Hong Kong, the Cathedral's fortunes similarly ebbed, and it was destroyed by a fire during a typhoon in 1835. The Fortaleza do Monte overlooks the ruin.

The ruins now consist of the southern stone façade — intricately carved between 1620 and 1627 by Japanese Christians in exile from their homeland and local craftsmen under the direction of Italian Jesuit Carlo Spinola — and the crypts of the Jesuits who established and maintained the Cathedral. The façade sits on a small hill, with 66 stone steps leading up to it. The carvings include Jesuit images with Oriental themes, such as a woman stepping on a seven-headed hydra, described by Chinese characters as 'the Holy Mother tramples the heads of the dragon'. A few of the other carvings are the founders of the Jesuit Order, the conquest of Death by Jesus, and at the very top, a dove with wings outstretched.

Guia Fortress

The lighthouse stands at 91 meters tall, and has a light visible for some 20 miles in clear weather conditions. The fort and chapel were constructed between 1622 and 1638, after an unsuccessful attempt by the Netherlands to capture Macau from Portugal. The lighthouse was constructed between 1864 and 1865, the first western style lighthouse in east Asia or on the China coast. The lighthouse stands at 91 meters tall, and has a light visible for some 20 miles in clear weather conditions. The complex was built upon the highest point on Macau, Guia Hill, and named after the same location.

Fisherman's Wharf

Its gonna be a hit with the tourist when the final furbishments are completed. nice ambience with nice food and themed hotels. great place to hang out.

the sweetest proposal

2007-08-29T00:19:00.000+08:00

Vaughn: "I had it all planned out. "

Sydney: "What?"

Vaughn: "I was gonna take you to the beach. Santa Barbara. We'd go out for a walk, maybe when the sun was setting. But now we're here, and I don't know what we're jumping into. And I may never get another chance to do this again. Sometimes I wake up before you do and I watch you sleep. And I'm overwhelmed because you are so amazing. And I don't know im lucky enough to have you in my life. But you're here with me. And I know I want to spend the rest of my life with you, trying to make you happy as you make me."

Sydney: "Oh my God, Vaughn..."

Vaughn: "Sydney Bristow, will you marry me?"

Sydney: *kisses Vaughn* "We're gonna make it outta here."

Vaughn: "Is that a yes?"

Sydney: *kisses Vaughn again* "Ask me on the beach."

Sydney's father interrupts: "We have 60 seconds..."

*buzzer sounds and fades in the background*

As sappy and romantically loserish I might sound; oh Vaughn sweet, you nearly put me to tears....

China, Yunnan, Kunming & Dali, Xiang Yun

2007-08-22T22:55:00.000+08:00

Right after my internship; it was rushing to pack and getting outta Shenzhen to Hong Kong.

Many of you know that I went to Kunming & Dali to visit my students (yes I’ve met them) alone. I know I should blog this as sweet memories; I hope short paras and pictures suffice. Pictures are above the paras. I reckon these are the best presents given to me(and God’s favor of course)

I’d like to thank you; for anyone whom have said a prayer (of lots of prayers) for me. For me to survive my lone journey to a remote place in China. I've been through challenging ordeals and with your prayers and Father’s guidance, I have braved it through. Thank You.

Number 1 thing to Thank God for:

6 August. Flew into Kunming from HK on a Monday afternoon. I nearly missed my flight from KM coz I wasn’t aware that they had changed the Gate from 4 to 44! Gate 4 was printed on my boarding pass and because they usually announce changes in Cantonese; I missed that information. I flew to Gate 44 (in time to board after a 3 min train ride from one end of the terminal to the other. (I didn’t mention that HKIA is HUGE, did I?) But I made it. phew~

Number 2 thing to Thank God for:

7 August. Kunming. A lady approached me and offered me cab services for a price. I haggled with success and hopped on . The driver was a darling really; a middle-aged male working as a private driver with a vehicle company. We chatted and when he learnt that I was a foreign student on a trip to visit my students (which was in his old town!), he offered to send me to the Bus Station and help find and purchase the correct bus ticket to Xiang Yun. And he did as he promised. I thanked him in smiles as he sent me to my Hotel safely. Met up with Edwin, Wei Xiong and Ade for a hot bowl of Guo Qiao Mi Xian!

Number 3 Thing to Thank God for:

The bus ride was… a little unbearable. Honestly alone with my bag pack, I didn’t DARE leave the bus to pee which meant I had to sit for 4-5 hours straight. I leave the rest to your imagination. Smoke and dirty seats were really annoying.

My kids (students) picked up at the correct place. I was a bit worried that the driver would drop me off at a remotish somewhere. BUT I alighted at the right location. The expression the kids had on their faces; I could never forget.

7 August. After a warm dinner hosted by Rong Rong’s dad, the night continued with the celebration of Huo Ba Jie (Fire Festival) where the villagers were literally playing with fire! It’s a festival passed down by the ethnic group; Yi Zu. Throughout the years, it was popularised by many and now most villages in China celebrate this festival. I saw little kids, grannys and grand dad, young able men playing and jumping over a huge flames, girls and young ladies holding hands dancing around the fire. People singing songs of joy and witnessing this event with my very own eyes was incredible!

The next few days were touring around Xiang Yun; the kids brought me to Yunnan Yi Feng Jing Meng Shen Gu where the Flying Tiger’s Airbase resided in the past. I also went to Shui Mu Shan where I met this intelligent young boy; Renjun who could answer ANY questions regarding China’s history. I was told he was the top scholar from his school and he majored in History and Arts. (if I’m not wrong) A pity I didn’t take any photos with him. I went into the tomb of many admirable shi fus/monks! And yes, I saw the remains ,which cannot be cremated by fire; which was said that only monks whom have attained enlightenment and wisdom could have such substance cultivated in their bodies. Amazing. I couldnt believe what I saw!

Yup; I went to a KTV Lounge in Xiang Yun. WOW! Unbelievable huh~ it was bloodie fun!

Some of the boys brought me to Jiu Long Gu (Nine Dragon’s Valley) for a mini BBQ! How fun! The first time I was on a horse carriage and on a lorry-vehicle-of some sort. Walking through those huge stone quarries reminded me of China’s massive lands and many resources; yet the sight of depleted mountains with a huge hole in them made me realise the scarcity of resources and the amount that would be left for use in the future. The problem, destruction and pollution were before my eyes; in spite of that, there's nothing I can do. For the survival of thousands of villagers; they have to make a living out of any job/resource they can get hold on.

Number 4 Thing to Thank God for:

The parents of my sweet students were so warm. I was very well taken care of (meaning well fed with exotic meat) during my stay. Blessed.

Number 5 Thing to Thank God for:

9 August. National Day. The kids took me to Xiang Bi in Xiao Ba (small van). And because of their kind guidance; I met Yun Juan and her family, and Yun chen and his family. Blessed. Really I am. I was relieved to see he was doing well and he was 4th in his class; just like he promised me. =) It was cute to see that he wrote down everything I told him about “The 4 Big No’s” in his life which includes; NO Gambling, NO Smoking etc… I saw that he used the English name I gave him. Such a sweet and diligent boy. =) I hoped Zheng Guo used his name well =) *Here, I would like all who knows Cheng Xi to say a prayer for him and his health coz I heard that he had stopped school due to his health. If you do not know him yet would like to say a prayer, thank you!* Time stood still when I saw Yun Juan and Yun Chen. YJ was still the innocent little girl while YC's voice matured & grew taller. I am SO proud of them.
Number 6 Thing to Thank God for:

12 August. My trip would never have been safe and smooth without these kids; Yu Sheng, Li Dan, Guo Jing, Yun Chuan, Hao Nan, Cao Rui and Rong Rong. Thank you. To each and everyone of you; you are my little angels sent from Heaven and I believe God will one day give you wings to fly far!

Number 7 Thing to Thank God for:

Before I forget, I recovered from a really bad cold which I had for the past week. Went to the doctor for a drip on the last day of work and left for HK. Being weakly and sick wasn't a joke when you are travelling alone. And lastly, providing a room for me in Kunming's Hotel when they were FULL on a Sunday (right, I did made reservations). I am really really lucky. This girl would have cried if she didnt have a room to stay for the night. It all worked out well. Thank God!

Reflections to be continued………. i have yet shown you the rugged pictures of the paths i had to tread; it wasnt all that easy and smooth.....

Happy Birthday Yun Chen. I wished he could hear it from me personally.

13th Birthday

2007-08-05T17:43:00.000+08:00

As much as I’d like to narrate my 23rd Birthday Experience word for word; I cant’ coz I’m typing this in the office. So I’m going to paragraph it with nouns/ events.

20 July 2007

Hot Yoga
Hot Yoga’s my latest interest. Honestly, Id prefer Hot Yoga to the Aroma Yoga anytime. You do Yoga in a room of 40 degrees and that’s the difference. The feeling of dripping perspiration is too awesome. I loved it.

Korean BBQ & Shuang Pi Nai
After yoga, Karen decided to give me a treat and brought me to this Korean BBQ place near Tian Hong Guang Chang at Mei Lin Jie. Reasonbly priced BBQ meat & sushi; food; those you barbeque the meat and wrap it up with fresh green lettuce. Next, my favourite shuang pi nai! Hahahah!!! Just a short walk from the BBQ place. I even got the Lady Boss to give me a discount card! Ha!

21 July 2007 (Night)
We opened up our Vodlka and Baileys and drank till we were all tipsy. Played Cai Quan, Hai Dai, Nai Cha etc… Woke up at 730am the next day with a really bad headache *hangover* I managed to drink some juice and went back to sleep. Woke up again at 1130am. *i spoiled the drunkard picture. was supposed to "act" drunk!*

Mysterious Delivery
Still containing my hangover *see my bedroom look*, someone rang up our apartment and asked Qiu Xin to open the gate. And I was told it was Adrian! Little did I know, it was the delivery man! I had flowers! Gosh! Its wasn’t like a puny bouquet; it covered my whole body when I tried to hold it. White roses wrapped with lovely purple décor; Thanks guys I loved it. However, it was my Buddy from school who was so very sweet and contacted them to buy flowers for me. Thanks Buddy! I really appreciate it coz it was it a really pleasant surprise. Anyways.. you are such a bad liar. lolx

Guizhou Mifen Near Nu Ren Shi Jie
Went to HQB (Hua Qiang Bei) to eat this popular Guizhou Mifen. NICE! =D The serving was big and I really enjoyed the noodles and soup the most!

Mother Earth Shopping
It was the usual shopping again behind Maoye. But I didn’t get anything… just walked around.

Pizza @ Shu Cheng
My colleagues; Ben, Mary, Karen, Hopeful, May and Xue Gong were present. Winna wasn’t around coz she had to go to India for a client meeting. Ate and took lots of photos. They bought my birthday cake at France Croissant; yummy! It felt like I was once in SP, where the whole lot of SPSU gang shouted and sang the birthday cheer. Karen sang a birthday song for me in Cantonese; totally rwaked!

Chocolate Café
All of us sat in and chilled. What touched me was Eric; a waiter in the Café. He was soooo sweet. He actually went out to buy a CD with a Happy Birthday song. In the end he didn’t play it because he was too shy! Lolx! Anyways, he gave us free samples of chocolate and I took a picture with him after we ended. *that's Eric by the way*

The Birthday Gift
The gang made a birthday card(Ah Mao drew it and the rest coloured it), a collage done by Michelle and a compiled video of all Birthday wishes of my colleagues and "the gift preparation vid" Ive got Batben from Ben!
____________________________

At 23, I realized that the numbers of your age doesn’t matter. What matters is that you enjoy yourself and that your friends celebrate it with you. Its as if they are as happy as you are. Thank you everyone which made this possible. Fariz, Joanna, Qiu Xin, Michelle, Donna, Zhong Wei, Shen Yeong, Ben, Mary, Karen, Hopeful, May and Xue Gong. What is most surprising that Xue Gong and Ben both got me presents; a stone necklace & BatBen(its the thought that mattered)

I received packages from Shan, Helen & Karen on separate occasions. Thank you all for your lovely little presents, which means you’ve thought of me. Xie xie ni! Steph, your card was late.. but its okay =) Everyone who texted me as well. Ive placed them on my table and they’ve been cheering me up every morning!

I didn’t make the same old wish that I had been making for the past few years. God didn’t allow it to happen, and so I gave up. My heart gave up. But its alright, we all have to move on somehow =) And so I made a new wish! I wish to find Faries Wonderland soon. This time... make it happen...

Yangshuo, Gulin, Guang Xi

2007-08-05T17:35:00.000+08:00

Prior to this trip, a colleague told us that they had planned a massage session for all of us in the marketing department. Due to miscommunication (and lack of an intranet/lotus notes) we weren’t informed. My colleagues and some managers were disappointed that we couldn’t go.
Then again, nothing’s stopping me from going on this trip. As you read on; you’d know why…

Yangshuo, Guilin, Guangxi Province
Weather: Sunny with sparse clouds
Date: 14 – 15 July 2007, Saturday & Sunday

I was fighting a really bad headache, cold, and flu throughout the whole week. Didn’t get better on Friday (the day I had to depart for Yangshuo) I had to force myself to see the clinic doctor. Felt like the virus’s slowing sucking all of my energy bit by bit; and it sucks because I hadn’t been eating well.

Sleeper Bus (Po Bu)

Right, this sleeper bus’s nothing like Ive seen before. When you get up the bus, you have to grab a plastic bag, take off your shoes, dump it in and carry it with you on the bus. The bus has 3 rows of sleeper "bunks" with 2 levels. The space to sleep in is just nice enough for my height! For persons taller than 1.63cm; I reckon you have to sleep with your legs slightly blent. On the ride to Yangshuo, I slept in a bunk near the middle of the bus. THAT would be that best space to sleep in. A word of caution; DO NOT EVER TRY SLEEPING AT THE BACK OF BUS, unless you like your sleep to be doused with flips, turns, constant vibrations, water sipping from a broken air-conditioning socket and the freaking heat at the bottom bunks. Yea~ I’ve said enough. My ride back to Shenzhen was UNBEARABLE, but still I survived the China’s Sleeper Bus! Honestly, for a 10 hour ride, I might prefer a seated coach ride.

Xi Wen Hotel @ Gui Hua Lu (a stone’s throw away from the popular Xi Jie)

Our tour guide Huang Shifu fetched us at the carpark where we alighted. The moment we got off the bus, some of us spotted a Hot Air Balloon! How fun! Huang Shifu told us that it cost 700 Yuan for an hour and you will have to sign an indemnity form. Ha! After walking for 15 mins in the wee hours of the morning, we came to his Hotel. Xi Wen Jiu Dian. Okay, it was more like a hostel with attached toilets. I wasn’t lucky, so Donna & I got a room with a really yucky toilet; where the place you shower is to stand just beside the squat toilet bowl. Hence, if you lose your footing, you might just drop in. Ha! Not fun after all huh. The beds were really comfy compared to my apartment’s. They’ve got hot water, free internet access, air-conditioning and a TV set. Nope; no towels. Xi Wen Hotel is quite a nice place for 120 Yuan per night (SGD 24). I reckon its rather reasonable. However, while my night there, I experienced 3 blackouts within 1-2 hours. I slept through the night without knowing that my air-conditioning was switched off. Kinda sucked but we only stay there for 1 night. I cant ask for much. Moreover, Huang Shifu’s daughter was EXTREMELY cute. I really loved her.

Gulin Rice Noodles

This bowl of noodles tasted superb! While slurping the smooth succulent noodles, it really felt great. I liked the nuts and the thin pieces of meat they added in the noodles. You can add soup in it if you like but I’d prefer eating it dry. SUPER NICE! Ha~ We had this for breakfast.

Lime Stone Cave

We sat on this 20 min coach ride to the cave while this really nice lady spoke about the Karst Mountains of Yangshuo. Each of them had a story to tell and she warned that people would usually say its 30% truth and 70% imaginary. Ha!

I should say I’m not really a fan of was stalagmite or a.k.a. limestone. There were some structures within the cave which caught my breath. Took lots of pictures so I’d let them speak for themselves. This tourism spot won some AAAA award; I guess the quadruple As meant that its REALLY good. But I beg to differ. Perhaps I just don’t appreciate such nature. I can only say Nature is amazing. For every 100 years, they will only increase 2cm in height. Remarkable huh!
The temperature within the cave is about a really cool temperature of 18~20 degrees. While strolling inside; the trickling of water down the stalagmite was really enticing. I wondered how Mother Nature molded such a magnificent structure within a mountain. It was totally unbelievable.

Li Jiang

We went drifting along Li Jiang on this 4-seater sheltered bamboo raft. When in Yangshuo, one HAS to go drifting along the "Jiangs" and "Hes" a.k.a. rivers. The peaceful river waters and the greenery indeed revitalizes one’s soul and mind. Totally relaxing. Left my feet in the cool waters and leaned back to enjoy the amazing Karst Mountains. I heard that these trade of drifting is slowly fading because the town commercializing all water drifting into these huge ferry boats which can carry about a hundred odd people. Then again why is it that this little town is sooo modernised? what happened to nature?

Yu Long He

A little different from Li Jiang, this rift was a 2 seater and our boatman was sooo cool! He chatted with QX and I most of the time and we got to learn that those Ang Mos loved Yang Shou and even rented some of their houses to stay in. Now I really wonder who really are the "xiang ba laos" or "xiang xia ren" (country bumbkins)! The long river had 4 separate short falls; each fall became more and more excited. Along the river, I managed to take 2 pretty shots and had my photo taken with a Monkey! =D

Cycling

Well, SY was nice enough to ride with me; him sitting at the front. Without much burden, I took on the role as the photographer and took a lot of photos! I can say he’s a great cyclist coz the journey we had cross had cars, trucks and motorcycles passing us here and there. It’s a crazy; just crazy to cross. I wonder how he does it. I just close my eyes and let him to all the navigate while I just had to rotate my legs.

West Street

Drifters
A western café selling really cheap americanised food. From breakfast to dinner. Amazing.
Mei You Café
Interesting style of promotion of the café as they tell you all the "Mei yous" of the café. Eg: Mei you bad food, Mei you bad service etc… I tried the spaggetti and its was yucky. Not sure about the others. And I found the place a little dirty (coz I was seated next to a drain! Gosh!!!! Yuck! It had a certain funny smell as well. Twasn’t a good place to eat in my opinion. The only good thing is that they have a live band in there and it is not recommended to sit just in front of the stage unless you have "super" invincible ears!

Bars
Man, West street boasts a wide array of BARS at night! We didn’t go to any bars that night. (coz I was sick) But the music and the people breathes life into you! Amazing huh! Just try it =)

Other Shops
I liked it that some shops paint art on shirts. They adapted them from my favourite cartoonist Jimmy! I bought 3 shirts which cost like SDG$6 each! =x I might sound like a bird now. They also sell lots of barang barang from musical instruments, jewellery to the famous Ginger Malt Candy; which I fancied.

Karst Mountians
Yangshuo, Guilin is THE place to see many many many many mountains at one single place. That place as one of the most mountains located in a single place. So the locals gave most of the odd looking yet nature mountain heads a story behind it. The 20 Yuan note is the picture of the karst mountains there! Simply breathe taking and I think it’s a sight of a life time. You wonder how Mother Nature did all this is one day? *shrugs* but its for REAL!

*will publish photos when im back in Spore*

Last Week in Shenzhen

2007-07-31T09:00:00.000+08:00

Dear Friends,

Apologises for not blogging as often as I would like. However, due to recent and unfortunate deadlines and events, my free time was halved!

1. My deadline for 2 of my SWOT Anaylsis & India Reports + Presentations are due tml.

2. My adaptor died-ed. Yes, she has officially retired and now she awaits my return to CIT to get her replaced not forgetting my notebook battery as well.

3. This means I cannot do wadever on my notebook. I will be away from the world of Computers from this Saturday onwards up till my return 2 weeks later. *GOSH!*

4. Hence I ought to fill in what I am planning to do now.

5. My trip to Yangshou & birthday entries are half-typed on my notebook. will only finish when i have proper power supply and TIME! (something which i have very little of; its a pity we cant buy it with monies....) I know all of you want to know how I spent it. In short, it was a splashin *13th* birthday ever; with new friends, lots of laughter and hand made cards. thanks to my shenzhen peeps.

6. Starting next Monday, Id be spending 1 week in Yunnan, Kunming & Dali, Xiangyun. Travelling alone yea. It's going to be thrilling and I feel the tense now. Im going to make it. I know all of you will pray for me. I have a cloudy picture of how im going to get there; nevertheless, im going to get there!

7. After that, id be meeting my lovely smu peeps and Gloria in HK. Im really looking forward to our trip to Macau & Shenzhen *again* =) There are plans to go to HK Disneyland as part of my birthday gift; wonderfulie bestowed by Gloria. We'll see how it goes =D

8. Then my lone flight back to Singapore. 18 Aug Midnight. Im sure you'd be able to see me pretty soon! However, Ive made a facial appt with Peiying's mum on 18th! Meet up with me after that OKAY? =D

9. I miss everyone esp my hamsters. This is this 1st time ive been away from home for so long. Not to worry, ive adapted very well and your thoughts, cards and gifts helped alot too!

10. Once again, I thank God for this wonderful experience, family & friends who stood by me, friends who took care of me in China, colleagues who constantly guided me in the company and yea that I am still alive.

With Love & Hugx*

2 Saturdays with Gloria

2007-07-12T15:29:00.000+08:00

23 June 2007

Picked my dear girl, Gloria, up from Luohu. The feeling was immensely over the moon! To see my best friend again was really comforting. I believe she felt the same as well. We ended up having an hour’s chat at Fairwood Eatery coz we spend wasted time at Louhu when we didn’t really wanted to buy anything.

Thanks to Gloria, I got to have dinner at the largest Japanese restaurant in Asia; Japan Fusion. The place was atrociously huge! We even got to wear clogs around the vicinity! How cool was that! The toilets were even cooler; the men’s peeing stand had rose petals in it! And the female’s cubicle’s were translucent! Next up, FOOD! GOSH, for such a huge place, its surprising that their sushi/sashimi's cheaper then Sakae Sushi! It’s definitely a good hunt in Shenzhen if you dig Japanese food. Our bill chalked up to 1000+ Yuan and fortunately, I didn’t have to pay a single cent! I got them my trusty Driver Zhang and send them off to their various destinations.

Anyways, Gloria had to go back that very night. After bidding her goodbye, I headed down to True Colour Bar and chilled out that night. A splendid Saturday.

30 June 2007

My dear girl came by again. I set out an hour earlier in the morning to Luohu to fetch her to my apartment. She came to join me a second time and we both had plans on how to spend another nice Saturday! We headed down to Chun Man Yuan for Dim Sum and the bill was surprising cheap! (we even had peking duck!) After, it was a full afternoon of pampering! Headed down to Maya City and we did a foot massage, body scrub and body massage all sponsored by my girlfriend. Both of us shared laughter, giggles as we chat about friends, family and the oldie conventional issue BGR. =) Twas like a imaginary day being princesses (but Gloria’s already a princess lah) really glad that it felt somewhat like the old days back in poly. It was truly worth remembering; every bit of it.

For dinner, we joined my colleagues for a local eat out (Li Shi Fu a.k.a. Master Li) at a Hunan Restaurant in Hua Qiang Bei. After which we headed to True Colour Bar where we invited all our Kaifa’s marketing department colleagues to join us. It was a night of chatting, live music, dice game, cai quan and lots of drinking *again*

As the night was still young, someone suggested we head to the most popular club in Shenzhen; Chicago Club. Gosh~ the place was indeed huge however it was best described in one word: Messy.

I guess there wasn’t any parking system. Twas drizzling slighty and we had to hurry in for shelter. The whole place smelt of smoke. (clubs are like that) Anyways, we had to leave our bags at a designated counter aswe went in. It didn’t felt comfortable because part of the place looked like it was temporarily tentaged for that night. Interesting sight. Led by Tony to the dance floor and it was WOW. I’d just be random; disco lights where most men shake their heads as if they were on drugs. ~~Coloured Wolves~~ Men looked really unkempt with their pants, sock and shoes. I wonder how can anyone dance like that?? Music you ask? Omg. Its like an Chinese retro-alien-jazz-noise altogether. You just go nodding.. and that’s it. They hardly play any songs of whatever language and you just have to either nod or step from side to side (that’s what I did) I found it hard to dance with men “trying” to grab you or something… its quite dumb.

The best part was; I was totally amused observing how the Chinese dance. Totally amusing. I couldn’t stop giggle, grinning or even containing my laughter. It’s a little hard to put into words but it’s still fresh in my memory. Ha~

The night ended with Ben sending us home smelling like smoke. I really hate it when I smell like that… but then again it’s worth the exchange for such a havoc yet interesting night.

My time with Gloria made me realise things about myself. Not new found ones but those that were buried there with solutions un-surfaced. Thank you girl, I can never tell you enough that you are one of the best things that happened to me. =) *hugx*

One of out conversations:

Alaska: “Okay, tell me what you think about him….”
Gloria: “Hmm…. Maybe you should consider Hong Kong men first?”
Alaska: “Okay but why? What’s wrong?”
Gloria: “Widen your choices girl…..”
Alaska: *breaks out into laughter*

And that’s her; my best friend.

Friendship

2007-07-03T16:25:00.000+08:00

I’m here for almost 2 months now. Its not exactly a long period either a short one. Another month to go before my internship ends (officially). AS time flew, I took time to reflect about lots of things.

Friendship

I really wanted to blog about Gloria’s visit before this entry. (dunt worry gal, its in the “writing”)
It has been in my mind for sometime even before I came to Shenzhen. Perhaps it’s the period where I have to let go and move on with our lives. Be it studies, relationships, friendships, vocations, ambitions or even dreams. The only challenge is by all these, we learn to cherish, compromise and grow old together.

During this period of thought, Ive heard a lot, experienced and grown. All of us have, I cannot deny that. My life’s became tight, busy and unfortunately singlehood has her grasp on me for now. Personal time is something I really cherish yet hard to earn. In addition, as responsibility grows with age, there is not such thing as stress-less life. (Unless you are fed from a golden spoon)

When challenges surface, I have to find a way to deal with it. With time, it becomes a habit and I tend to keep stuff inside. It got so bad to the extent that I find it hard to voice it. So what should I do?

1. I dun have a “so-called” boyfriend to run to / cry to.
2. Talk to friends. (which group of friends? The 1o years?, 7 years?, 2 years? Or hi-bye ones?)
3. Be strong a find a solution
4. Other alternative: please enlighten me

With or without a partner , whichever you choose and according to your character, its always different due to various reasoning.

A good friend shared one of her fears with me recently (thank you for trusting me, dearie) and I realised that im not alone. We have many in common. I should learn to let go of the “so-called” friendships even if it’s long. When I say let go, it means less expectations (or none) for the other. I truly appreciate every thought of me thought cards, MSN or just a small “how are you?” (thank you Karen, you really made my stay in SZ happier).

Often asked myself if I didn’t decide to blog, would my friends know my existence? Would I have faded away into the society unnoticed by the passing faces of ones known as friends?

I remembered I tried to reason the meaning of friendship to a close male buddy of mine. And it fit perfectly. However, I have second thoughts. I yearn for something else more in a friendship; am I unreasonable to think that way? I find that time dilutes the meaning of friendship and hence it takes someone who cares & extra effort to bond it again.

Should I be disappointed or relieved of the expectations I have? I can only humbly move on with my life coz it’s my future I have to carve out myself. Life in Shenzhen taught me many things. Having dreams or being able to HOLD onto one is such a precious gift! And to be able to pursue one‘s dreams her e in SZ is extremely hard. What are my dreams? Do they align yours? It doesn’t matter if it doesn’t. However, are you able to support and understand me as your friend?

That is what makes the fine line. Think about it my friend.

Bottom Line: Some beliefs & expectations need to change and I need to mature with this. God, give me strength and see me through this.

Guangzhou

2007-06-29T10:56:00.000+08:00

16th – 17th June 2007
[Weather: Clear and Sunny]

Shenzhen Train Station

Our driver left us behind the train station and we had to walk from the back of the building to the front. To find where the departures of trains, search for electronic stations which dispenses train tickets. It’s rather easy to purchase tickets as it has a heat sensing screen. First, you choose which station you wish to alight. Second, select the time of departure and the number of tickets you wish to purchase. Third, slip in the money for the tickets and out comes the electronic paper tickets! The ticket works like an EZ link card in Singapore. You have to tap the ticket at the barricades and tap when you get out. The only difference is only that the ticket can only be used once. Well, I saw some people topping up their paper tickets at this machine. However, those are for locals and as I was in a hurry, I wasn’t able to check it out. The vicinity is rather new, clean and spacious. There are sufficient signages hence I don’t think one is able to be lost there; unless you don’t read Chinese.

On The Train

To my pleasant surprise, the seats were clean and spacious. There’s a bunk overhead to leave your bulky hand carry luggies. The 50min train ride was really comfortable because I fell asleep. The seats are numbered hence you need not rush in as they open the doors 10mins before the stipulated departure time. However, the trains leave exactly on time. If you are late, you are late; buy another ticket and get on the next train. The toilets are clean yes but a little stinko. If you mind stenches like such, I reckon you get those perfumed tissue and cover your mouth and nose as you do your “business”. Don’t bother bring food in coz they sell food stuff on a pushcart. It’s affordable and edible too. Cold and hot water dispensers are available should like a drink or have cup of instant noodles. Smoking isn’t allowed on the trains. (thank god) Oh, there will be this lady who will walk past with cups and a flask of hot tea in her hand. Be sure to call her as she walks past you to get a free hot cup of tea. Hee~ Anyways, the trip there cost me 80 yuan.

Guangzhou Dong Train Station

Different from the station in Shenzhen. A little messy with people walking in all directions as you hear people speaking in Chinese over your shoulders. Signages are big so not to worry. I’d advise you use the train’s toilet before alighting as its cleaner than the ones at the station. Guangzhou Dong Station is supposedly less messy and complicated than Guangzhou Station so I guess we’re quite blessed and not mugged by some unknown Chinese. Just beware of your surroundings. If you do not speak Cantonese or Chinese, best advice is to keep your gap shut unless necessary. You wouldn’t know who’s eyeing your belongings hence its better not to invite unnecessary attention to yourself. Just turn left and head out to the roads where you’d find a cab to take you wherever you want.

Cabs/Taxis & Buses

We traveled on highways hence the meter kept jumping and jumping! The cabs are rather similar to Shenzhen’s the only difference is that they charge you an additional 1 Yuan for fuel fee. Buses are generally the same compared to Shenzhen. All the drivers on the roads are extremely skilled when driving around bends and speeding which seems effortlessly safe.

Beijing Lu

The place calls out to all shopping freaks! Selling all sort including fakes, apparels, bags, shoes etc… there’s a lot more stuff then I can list. Ever seen how the olden days’ roads look like? Back in those Ming and Song Dynasties? Yup, they actually preserved some parts the olden roads along Beijing Lu and its incredibly interesting to me! Oh! Do try the fruit flavoured ice-cream which cost only 1 Yuan!

7 Days Inn [ http://www.7daysinn.cn/inn.asp?id=8 ]

I was elated to find a cheap hotel like motel. One room per night cost us only 187 Yuan! Tho’ sparsely decorated with furnishing, it’s quite pleasing to find a really comfortable bed, bathroom and TV. We even got an extra pillow for each room! The receptionists at the lobby were friendly as most importantly they spoke English! That’s a bonus! You don’t need to lug your showering items or towel there because it’s been provided for! Also available were toothbrushes, comb, hair dryer for common use and electric flask.

Travelynns

There’s a bus stop [省邮校 ] right outside the hotel. Take Bus 819 to Ti Yu Zhong Xin where you get to the place where you find food and shopping.

You’d pass by a building on the right which says SUNING, a U-turn, a tall tower which looks like an inverted U, and along a small road with trees at the side. Alight and get to 体育西站 [MTR] and using the underpass, get to Exit D2 to a shopping mall called正佳广场. There is a really good Shuang Pi Nai shop; 雯信 within 宏Jun广场 which is adjacent to 正佳广场. Shang Xia Jiu (Up down 9) is also near the MTR however, we have to walk a distance

Shang Xia Jiu (Up down 9)

A shopping area which is more a little complicated then Beijing Lu. Pedestrians walk alongside vehicles and on a dusty road. Shops lined in a untidy order, people shuttling in and out and crossing at their own will. It’s a mess of cars and people. We saw a GEMs mall selling all sorts of beadies, pearls and wad-nots for jewellery. I guess it’s the retail place for GEMs after all. What a great find! Always remember to start at 1/3 of the opening/quoted price . Haggle aggressively (like the Chinese; it may seem uncouth at first…. When in Rome, do what the Romans do!) and you’d be able to bag loads of savings and return home with a smile. I know coz I was grinning. Hee~

hamsters

2007-06-12T14:38:00.000+08:00

while in the middle of work, I thought of MLTR and I went to search some of their songs.

the song "Im gonna be around" popped out of my mind and I miss Kuroi Chan terribly.

I do remember 7 Feb. The day I held him and I sang him this song before I left him to Father. And whenever I sing this song, my eyes will water.

I miss chip and cola.

A Cup of Sugar’s Tale

2007-06-06T18:52:00.000+08:00

Woke up this morning with a horrible, gripping tummy ache again. It hurt so much I was moaning in pain. So I went to the sick bay for the second time (with the same amount of drip bottles as before) My roomies said I looked like white piece of paper. Lips pale and all. I knew I was getting better coz my fever went down. QX ordered white congee for me and I asked her for a cup of sugar. That’s where the amusement started. She was very kind to go up to the canteen to get a spoonful of sugar for me. (least I thought I needed just a spoonful for my very insipid plain congee.) She got back a huge cupful of sugar and we started laughing. The chefs might have thought she was nuts for wanting sugar! And JUST sugar! Hahah! Usually we eat congee with soy sauce but I wanted sugar coz I couldn’t eat anything oily/salty. HA! So *hugx* to QX for braving that to get me sugar! Didn’t eat much & after I went home to rest. Was really tired anyways.

Conclusion: Not working for 2 days felt shiok, but feeling sick at the same time sucks. Honestly, I do I missed my desk in my office. Seeing familiar faces etc… Albeit my virgin stint on THE drip, I reckon its really effective as it goes directly into the blood stream. Usually id take a bloodie whole week to recover from my diarrhea. However I could eat a day after. So yup. DRIPS ARE EFFECTIVE provided if they are sanitized. But it was a little painful for me. Doctor Hu said it was natural reaction due to the reaction of the medicine in direct contact with my blood stream.

Jo fell sick too. Check out her blog for details.

Drippy in the Sick Bay

2007-06-06T18:00:00.000+08:00

Awoke this morning with a horrible tummy ache & fever. Early that morning, I puked 3 times, had diarrhea least twice. Couldn’t eat felt super lethargic. The usual medication they gave us was to put me on drip. I had 2 small blue bottles, one green medium bottle and a BIG green glucose. The big one hurts a lot because they added medication in the bottle. It was the first time I was put on drip for least for 7 hours. I felt super weak and dizzy when I got up to go to the toilet. You have to hold the bottle in my left had as the needle was inserted into my right hand. The beds were white and clean, and it was definitely more comfortable then my bed in my apartment. Li Chuang, Winna and Tony came to visit me and Winna called a car to bring us home, Mary called food delivery and Ben texted me. Am blessed as I got rest and I realised that my colleagues and my friends really cared about us (Esp. my roommates). I went home and slept for rest of the day.

Happy Kindgom

2007-06-02T23:00:00.000+08:00

Weather: Sunny with parts cloud

We took a train ride to Shi Jie Zi Chuang and took Exit A to Happy Kingdom. All day tickets cost 150 RMB but we paid only 145 RMB cos’ we had 5 RMB discount coupons. (To qualify for this, go to any Hotel in Shenzhen and grab their brochures before going). The Number of *s indicate the level of excitement in my own honest opinion. Maximum ratings are 5 *s. I am no journalist, just a travelyn-ner.

Space Shot @ Mt. Adventure [ * * * * ]

Twas the first ride we sat on. Personally I still have a phobia for heights and that thing measured a 60m! The whole thing lasted just 1.8 mins! HA! The shortest ride yet one of the most thrilling one. We queued for about 1 hr which was fortunately the longest we had to queue so far for the day anyway. That was why we were smiling like a bunch of kiddies the whole day.

Suspended Looping Coaster @ Shangri-la Woods [ * * * ]

I was a little apprehensive about the ride. However when I got on it… there wasn’t much to be scared about! Haha! Twas just plain thrilling with your legs danglin’ only your hands grasping tightly against your seat. The view about was wonderful. We took a second ride later, and it was not as exciting as before. For this we queued for only 30 mins! Ha! From the background, it looked like a red dragon sliding on the yellow railings

Shoot the Chute @ Tyhoon Bay [ * * ]

We bought ponchos for 5 RMB, put them on and ran on the ride. I found the exciting part was the splashing and squirting of water. The descent was really boring… anyhows.. we took a second ride! Just to get the “wet” experience again. We didn’t queue long. We just went in and TADAA~ We’re in! haha!

Top Spin @ Tyhoon Bay [ * * * * ]

Guess I enjoyed this the most! It lifts you up and turns you round and round. Had my eyes peeled open the whole time and the suspense was over this world! 5 stars for this ride! “WOOHOO” factor racing high~ The commentator was really good and keeping our excitement level running!

Lunch @ Mian Dian Wang near Happy Times

Pleasant surprise that there was Mian Dian Wang there. However, it cost 1 RMB more then the usual price. I didn’t eat anything, wasn’t hungry anyways. While we finished our meal, it started to rain and so we sat a while longer while playing the “fingers” game. Louis taught me this a while a ago and this was a really great game to make time crawl faster. Shenzhen’s weather is indeed unpredictable. It will start pouring really heavily and then it will be really sunny for while. It could start to shower for 15 mins and stop! This seldom happens in SG. Funny huh~

Haunted House @ Shangri-la Woods [ * ]

Just one interesting find. They use real people to scare you. Then again, it wasn’t scary at all. *yawns* We only did it to pass time. =.=

Discovery @ Happy Times [ * * * * * ]

This ride rotates as it swings you left and right. The view on top was awesome. Although you feel your tummy turn, it was one of my best rides. The mountains in the background were beyond words describable. And yes, I did not close my eyes for one bit while up there.

4D Theatre @ Happy Time [ * * * * ]

A 10 min show featuring a cartoon. I was pondering about the 4D definition as I awaited the show to start. When I got out, I understood why. It was REALLY 4D with really vibrations, trembling, and water experience. Of coz the 3D effect.

Reflections

For most of the rides, we did not queue as long as we had expected. Twas largely due to the weather forecast and slight showers here and there. We were really lucky. Just wanted to let loose and I got what I wanted. I reckon the whole experience was fun, however little things made me really annoyed. Since Im a travelyn-er, these shouldn’t get me down.

1. People cutting queues.
2. People who smokes around me. Smoke BOTHERS me.

I got pissed and I started to bite at people who try to cut my queue. There was this shameless bas**** who kept cutting our queue. So I stared hard at him giving him a stern comment in mandarin. “Do not cut MY queue you ill mannered person”. Well, he shamelessly puffed on his cigger and nonchalantly stepped aside. When it comes to me, Im NO pushover. The gang was too meek which irritated me alittle. Yet, this is people, life and yea… it doesn’t matter whether it changes or not.

Smoke really bothers me. BIG TIME. Cos’ it chokes up my respiratory system and I have a headache. So I call them arseholes. It got really bad one time I had to bend over to breathe and regulate my breathing. I was REALLY PISSED. Inconsiderate smokers should die! Don’t they know passive smokers die earlier!?

A Rascal's Birthday

2007-05-22T14:06:00.000+08:00

i miss chip & cola...really i do

Right... shen yeong's birthday fell on Sunday (20 May) tho' it was raining (since Friday till today), i guess it went well. Id let the video speak for itself....

Anyways, ive never been so shagged while working.. and dozing off while working sucks. So... it simply says that im not cut up for office work. I NEED TO RUN AROUND while working.... urgh~~ its been like this for my previous jobs. Can I start doing more things than just translating of work and looking up for contract laws?

here's some photos... its random.. and of coz... i love myself and so ha! you'd get to see alot of me here... (some paras have been edited becoz i was pissed)

my company & my printed chinese Name

With Charles on the left

Me & Hai Shang Shi Jie (A Hotel in a Cruise Liner)

Tony & Me : pretty ditzy that night

my girl/roomie : Joanna

the girls' bench....

the rascal's party & the gang im living with for 3 months

Hopeful is a girl whom i met and she touched me with her story of her name. Hopeful, im blessed to know you....

My First Week

2007-05-19T08:19:00.000+08:00

Im awake at 820am on a Saturday while my hsemates/friends/colleagues are still asleep. Its been a week since ive touched down in Shenzhen. Believe me when I say I was immediately exposed to the cultures here (at the shenzhen airport) so... id begin my short framed write up about my wonderful week yet. To make my journal readable; there are 8 people on this trip namely; Sheng Yeong (a cute boy with a body girls would DIE for), Zhong Wei (a humourous fellow who never fails to entertain me with his lame stories, puns and wadnots), Michelle (a girl with a direct attitude), Donna (dresses boyishly and very "english" speaking), Joanna (my hsemate and a really sweet pretty girl), Qiu Xin (my other hsemate, warm and bubbly, she is also attached with me in the MSD - Meter Systems Division) and finally Adrian (the oldest guy of the lot and speaks charismatically, a wonder at playing "Bluff"

Friday

The budget terminal looked cute with yellow and purply colours. Its quite hard to miss it if (like me) its your 1st time arriving at a budget. Tiger Airways and the carrier was alright, only that budget airlines meant narrow seat pitch and limited services. however the service provided by the flight attendants were not too bad. Arrive at 1105pm in SZX, got out of the customs within half an hour. Charles (a singaporean QA manager working in SZX) waited for us and we were outta the airport in a mini van.

Saturday

Lian Hua Yi Chun (Lotus Village One) in Futian is where we will be staying for this period. Stayed on one of the expats flats on the 8th floor becos its the only apartment that had a 3 room apartment and is the biggest. Charles brought us to eat at this restaurant serving SUPER nice morning tim sum called Dragon Tiger Gate (long hu men). the soya milk (duo jiang) and dough sticks (yiu tiao) were the best! Afterwhich we got a local topup line for work and went to Mei Tian's Carrefour to shop for daily neccessities. We chalked up the longest receipt with the highest cost! hahahahaha!!! Girls will always be girls. I spent quite a bit too. coz i had to buy a lot of stuff here. On top of that, food is self payable and so is our hse utilities. We had the company's mini van to chauffeur us around. so hows that for being a princess! ha! We went to SZX's bookstore (SZX Shu Cheng) and said to be the largest in Asia. and its REALLY big! im not joking.. over there we had really nice noodles for dinner!

SUNDAY

SHOPPING DAY. i desperately needed to get a work bag and some work clothes hence we headed down to Hua Qiang Bei's Nu Ren Shi Jie (Women's World) It was somewhat like bugis village's but the stores might be smaller and they spanned throughout 5 levels. Selling accessories to clothes, shoes and bags. Charles brought us to this SUPER cheap DVD store here. HA! im a happy movie girl now =p (we've been watching several movies here at our apt and over at Sheng Yeong's apt) the first ever time a boy with a such a chiseled body that could me horny! (ok maybe i exaggerated) im serious. haha! just that he's a little shy to be seen topless. Zhong Wei and Sheng Yeong stays just oppo us on the 8th floor as well. Just to add that beggaring is very common here (you see mothers with her sick child sitting by the roadside nodding her head non-stop for money) i was upset seeing all of these... but i had to accept that its just life here.. there is nothing i can do... =( so i told myself... i will only expose myself to the good and interesting cultures and not dwell on bad sights... =D (I determine what i want to experience and learn!) Dinner was Jiang Xi Cuisine; the meal was treated by Cheok (the head of marketing for HDD (he is a big shot), charles and jimmy...whom were all sporeans)

Monday

I couldnt believe I had to WALK to work in heels and we TOOK 30 MINS! Actually from my apartment, we can see our company Shenzhen Kaifa. the first day was boring.. Met several people and we were OBVIOUSLY overdressed. over here, the employees really dress DOWN. that forced me not to put on make up and not to wear accessories and stuff (sooo not alaska right...) Our Manager handed us a task schedule. After studying that paper, we realised we were here for serious business and not SK (sai kang) Joanna said in her own words, "we have our work cut our for us" that its soooo freaking true. and so the stress begins. Perhaps the fun part is eating at our canteen. We eat with the managers and is considered the most expensive place (8 yuan) with good food. tho' our taste buds differed greatly, i guess we were still treated quite like princes and princesses. ha! Kaifa is huge with 8000 plus employess... i could detail to no end... so id leave it as that... that im working in a big company in the MSD Marketing department.

Tuesday

Went for a company training (pei xun) and went on company site visits and reading of a ABB report on Meter Products. It was extremely exhausting listening to people speak in PURE Chinese and using Chinese vocabs. on most occasions (due to the nature of the produce we are currently assigned to), I find it really really challenging to express myself in chinese. however, my colleagues said that im the best of the whole lot in speaking. meaning my pronunciations and vocabs are better than my peers. Here, not speaking in proper chinese is super embarrassing; very unlike singapore. here, we are considered chinese but not knowing how to SPEAK chinese (let alone write the characters) made me feel really dumb and yes... embarrassing. anyways, my chinese will definitely improve when i get back. and so YES shah, im seriously chinatized at this rate, i have no choice!!!!

Wednesday

More site visits and reading of ABB report. realised that i get very tired at work in the morning and in the afternoon. esp everynight there's hsework to do and its really exhausting. hence im always trying to sleep early if possible (which explains why i couldnt blog, only blogging on a beautiful Saturaday morning). I felt truely blessed when i did the factory rounds, where i see operators (factory workers) putting in chips in the PCPB. doing routined work day in and out. They are def my age and when i was walking around, peering over their shoulders observing them, i felt sad. we are definitely blessed with the opportunity at education which will mean a better life. and the 1st time i saw actual production lines producing meters to India and Italy. Superb. All of us should really cherish what we have in Singapore; the opportunities and all. Im def treasuring my time here. My other colleagues are so generous, warm and forth giving, sharing experience and asking us whether we are coping well and stuff. (but i wonder whether is it becoz we are from spore and they are told to "treat" us better? im not sure... we usually have lunch outs (drive out in private vans) with the vice president and the other high level managers. =/ hows that for erm... low profile?? )

Thursday

Had to translate an Indian Meter (Lot2) user manual to proper English. unfortunately, their command of english expressions are similar to our chinese and hence we had to spend time reading and rephrasing. Running around to ask for engineers for explanations. YES. its just work..... went home and did the usual housework.

Friday

Manual translation again. Our VP (Mr Pan or Pan Dong : SUPER BIG SHOT) and charles treated us to a really posh restaurant boasting of Guang Zhou Cuisine. Super nice and healthy.. the Feng Jiao (chicken feet is awsome) Experienced the 1st blackout in the history of Kaifa's new (1.5 years) office. HA! how lucky! we knocked off at 430pm but the rain started to pour REALLY hard. 1st time i saw such a strong downpour with lighting and thunders. our colleagues invited us to dinner at for Hunan Cuisine which is really very spicy and oily. drank soooooooooo much beer (local brewed Kingway) i felt like floating when i headed for the toliet. didnt puke. was Ben's birthday last week so i had to make a toast to him by bottoming up! Headed to a local KTV called California Red (Jia Zhou Hong) and used a VIP room. SANG AND SAND AND SANG! really enjoyed myself to the brim! oh... i mentioned it was raining and the roads were JAMMED PACKED! and sooo Tony (our colleague and driver) make a de-tour. his version of a detour is to DRIVE ON THE pedestrain pathway!!!!!!!!!!!! OMGosh!!! this is the first time and i was so shocked!!!! so you can see what SZX drivers do. there is NO SUCH thing as TRAFFIC here. Being with them, i felt i could immerse myself in their culture in no time! hahahahahahaaha! and its only the 1st week, when i get back... id be really SHENZHEN zai! hahaha!

Saturday

I woke up (now and today) the earliest to blog and wanted to do abit of Yoga. Will be having tim sum brunch with my friends later and meeting charles for another fun fun outing later. Need to get my top i ordered last week and to buy a Birthday cake for Sheng Yeong. hahahah... im contemplating to make him strip topless and do a pole dance....BUT.. maybe its for my own entertainment for he has a good body to look at! *droolx* honestly, if he were older, id like him (for his body) WHAHHAHAH! i dun even mind making the 1st move or even it were just one night. OKAY.. i digressed.. anyways... its gonna be a splashing weekend! =D

Id upload photos soon... perhaps find a way to put it up~ on flickr or something? =D

Cheers*~

Toodalooos

2007-05-11T16:00:00.000+08:00

in a while, id be leaving for thee Fay Gay Chong (airport in cantonese). these feet of mine will venture into new grounds and i will be anticipating what's on the other side of that door. will definitely miss blogging until i can sneek internet time from the company. if not, just accept that I wouldnt be online for a while. have always wanted to stay away from MSN (only when im busy) and its great i could use a little practise now.

i had fanta-bulous weeks of fun after the exams. my grades were alright too so im really thankful. and im truly blessed to know such great pals from school. =D each of you took my hand and guided me (away from harm) in a different way. of cos, Thank you Father; providing me this opportunity to get away for a reason (finally, my escape! wooohooo!)

For friends (like Helen, who'll worry mad for me): I promise Id stay safe *hugx*

For friends who liked to stay in contact with me: Id be bringing my SG no. but please dun call unless necessary ;) dunch want you to burn a hole in your pocket yikes! . Alternatively, I will purchase a local line and if you like, get the number from me and we'd chat!

Email me at my school, yahoo.com.sg or hotmail address if there are news like .... THE NEXT COHORT of BBM INTAKE ARE BOYS! hahaha okay okay kidding... Serious Matters, get in touch with me aye. Will be checking on my school emails more often then the rest.

have I got everything in? i hope so... because I have to leave now ;)

*chip & cola: i will miss you very much*

with hugx & kisses ***** Toodalooos!

Celebrity Look Alike Me???

2007-05-07T02:11:00.000+08:00

Gosh... this is soooooo FUN! Honestly, ive never thought i looked pretty close to a celebrity but hey if they're pretty and i look like them (70-80% )? IM PRETTY TOO huh! hahahah! this is too hilarious so im sharing it... have fun! yay! alaskie's one happy girl for the night!

Ive decided to be sure and apply the Law of Averages! Hence i ran random *cam-whoring* pictures of myself and vio-la~ ive got these results... (Im warning you to ready a paper bag coz you'd puke!)

*Update again on 8 May: my hands were too itchy... so silly me... i ran pictures of an anoymous somebody's photo and the results??? ive got pretty female celebrity photos! which means HE is a pretty boy! whahahaha i still cannot believe my @@ (EYES!!!) and i cannot stop laughing this is toooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo funny to even look at....*

Some of the common ones are... Ueto Aya, Phyllis Quek, Tata Young, Zhang Zi Yi, Aya Matsuura, Gillian Chung, Joey Yung, Song Hye Gyo and Sammi Cheng.... HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! this makes a good laugh!

random again

2007-05-03T18:37:00.001+08:00

For a moment I was delirious, falling asleep after watching a sappy flick off my notebook. huh. Guess what. my phone rang; Gillian called but the reception in my room's at it again. i got hung up. could hear my mom pulling her keys outta her bag and prying that lock to get in. gosh. and i awoke. I called her; she needed to borrow my locker in school. not a biggie.

its been near over a week. praying for the days to crawl but ive have X more days left. hows that? was chatting over msn with a fellow friend of mine. ( a very very good friend whom i promised to meet up next week for Dinner I suppose) While my danity fingers typed away, he pulled a question on me, "Will you miss me?" ....... It didnt take me long to spill an answer. "I dunno... I guess I need to be really focused when Im there. Missing is a painful pricking emotion. Other then that, yes there's friends, family and of coz Chip and Cola!" ( I cleverly diverted his attention to my hamsters) Thats Trick No.1 to use when you do no wish to explain why even though you know why if you get what i meant.

while the conversation continued, i realised im kinda scared losing the feeling and all of the sudden it dawned on me that I am actually quite tired of falling in and out. it stupifies the brain cells! and i dun mean to say that in the academic sense but yea. it does! Like you dunno how to react and you're like a 3 year old acting in a 70s classic film! one word: Tragic. anyways. that's me when being put under the limelight with a microphone stuck to my teeth.... sadly words doesnt come out.

I went in a frenzy when i noticed that Pilot's screen (top left to be exact) had some weird shadowy streaks. Naturally the magic four-lettered word came out and I was rubbing it hard to calm myself down, praying; ITS NOT DEAD PIXELS! urgh~ okay.. but i guess it is. *four-lettered word again* thank god, its not right smack in the middle. =/ Its been's 2 ole years Pilot's with me....always by my side... allowing me to caress him with my fingers on his keys..... smmoooothe~ he never failed me, not once and he is going to accompany me on my working trip! Dun go calling me crazy.... I've got huge a affection for most non-living things (personal of course) and im proud of it! Back to the notebook. finally changed my desktop wallpaper to Baby Inuyasha... *coooos* I love my PILOT! and by next week we shall fight ~~crime~~ side by side together!

Someday when I'm awfully low
And the world is cold
I will feel a glow just thinking of you
And the way you look tonight
With each word
Your tenderness grows
Tearing my fears apart
With each laugh that wrinkles your nose
Touches my foolish heart
~ taken from my Best Friend's Wedding sung by Mike O'Neil

Another Week

2007-04-28T04:39:00.000+08:00

Alright... Im back to update what Ive done this past FUN week!

Sunday

1. Room Cleaning Day 3

2. Dream LG Wine

3. Family Dinner @ Vivocity

Monday

1. Gym with the girls (okaaaayyy... i was SUPPOSED to go; but I overslept .... really bad)

2. Met Ariel, Gillian and Felicia for a FUN FUN KTV session

3. Brought LG Wine & Bro's N65 for Gmask by this ah beng with a SUPER nice soft voice.

Tuesday

1. Travel Insurance (the super cheap one.. )

2. Met up with Mr Yau from Kaifa Singapore (knocked some reality into me; that I am LEAVING SPORE soooooon!)

3. Dinner with Norliana, tour around marina bay with me as the guide...

Wednesday

1. Room Cleaning Day 4

2. Dinner @ Fish & Co. Suntec with Team Y@Y

Thursday

1. Golden Mile Steamboat with Mareen & CB group

2. Yoga classes with Mother

Friday

1. Gym with the girls

2. Lunch with the girls

3. Edmund's Bdae BBQ

4. Drinking Session with the Boys (Jinghao, Ivan, Zhimin, Edwin & Louis)

Saturday

1. Met Linda

2. Shopping with Sister (the lil brat)

3. Saw Kenneth (incidentally @ Soup Spoon)

YEA! Im packed these 2 weeks but Im really really really really happy! Most of my memories were captured on photos and I will be thinking about YOU guys when im not in spore. Now, its only Chip & Cola whom I will miss terribly.. hahah! Just home from somewhere in singapore with FREAKING smelly hair. Im going to WASH it again tml. (toooo tired now) Btw, each and every one of the boys were great! tho' i was the LEAST drunk. They made sure I was home safely. Honestly, what beats having friends like them! XIE XIE NI MEN! Oh yea... i got super excited when ivan suggested a tioman trip. TIOMAN!!!!!!!!!!! i really miss snorkelling... but i wunt know when id be back =( sigh~*~*~

Id leave you with some photos... its 5.04am... freaking tired...

the arrival of the long haul

2007-04-19T00:51:00.000+08:00

Bodyclock's been soooooooo not obedient... im having irregular sleeping hours and durations for the past 3 days. anyways... the LONG HAUL is here! WOOO HOOO! The following was/is my BUSY schedule for the week. *im terribly elated*

MONDAY
1. 5 hours of sleep
2.Took passport photos @ 11am
3. Facial with Helen & ZY at PY's mum's place
4. Shopping with my gals

Tuesday
1. 2 hours of sleep
2. Applied for visa at Chinese Embassy @ 830am
3. Breakfast with the Team
4. Went to Campus to pick up Academic Certification
5. Chatted with Ricky Tang (Asst.Director of China Internships)
6. Dropped off Internship Declaration Form
7. Lunch & Tennis with the OG Boys at Weizhe's place with Coach Adrian and Coach Jin Han * Tennis is SOOO Fun!*
8. Drove to Geylang for Dinner (WZ's idea)
9. Strolled past the *red light district*
10. Dessert @ Ah Chew (Met Lou, Ivan, Jimmy, Rouhui, Edwin, Jing Hao, Bao Yu & Geraldine there!)

Wednesday
1. 8 hours of sleep (getting better)
2. Shopping Marathon @ Vivocity with ZY, SH, Steph and Helen (didnt even manage to complete our marathon! Vivo's too big)
3. Food & Girl Chat at Kim Gary (Lunch) & Food Republic (Dinner)
4. Girls got me a pretty wedding band cos I will be unofficially "married"soon *thanks BABES!*

Thursday
1. Room Cleaning Day 1
2. Be-lated Birthday dinner with Karen
3. Yoga Classes with Mother

Friday
1. Gyming in Campus with SH, ZY, Steph and Helen
2. Lunch with ZY
3. Collect Passport at Chinese Embassy
4. Collect Scissors from Amy

Saturday
1. Room Cleaning Day 2
2. Shopping with Ariel (vivocity ... yea again)
3. Dinner with Gillian
4. Late Drinking Session with Wenjun

Im really trying to sleep early nowadays (thanks to my pre-exams-muggin) While I blissfully enjoy every single one of my darling friends' company, will etch each memory into my heart so I wunt be lonely when my month's time is up. Honestly, I havent really figured out "how" I should feel towards him. Have thought that it wouldnt be neccesary but it would be a really sweet to "have". Id have to freeze my brain cells and be cold about this. *just for a moment* its only my wishful thinking.

I would love to give him a good bye hug before I leave. *sigh... Chin up.. its not THAT long anyways... the school bells will start ring'in soon~ =D*

Once again... my life journey is in your hands Father.... guide me and lead me. Amen.

will blog about other MORE impt stuff and reflections soon. *ENJOYMENT IN PROGRESS* hah!

5 Random Thoughts

2007-04-15T04:11:00.000+08:00

1. Cuddling Chip & Cola feels so bloodiee goooood. and this feeling is indescribable.

2. the hands of time passes us mercilessly. afraid for no reason.

3. i have successfully not slept for 36 hours and counting (i lasted 46 hours without sleep, my current record)... im up struggling (to stay awake) to type up a 5 page report due tml. yea, i should have done it earlier so and and so forth. but i guess my other reports and presentations fell under my "priorised" time. and this got shuffed to the back. usually the last assignment deadline would be the last i would touch on. in this case, i had one day to do it. this isnt a complain its just reflects that in life (working life) you cant have all the time in the world to do everything important. some issues have got to wait.

4. speaking of not sleeping; my head is starting to pound. im not a sicko who ill-treats herself. when im stressed i cannot sleep. thats my problem. why is falling asleep so hard for me?

5. I know.. im starting to cough, thoart's dry, my pounding head is already a sign that something major is coming. but its okay, if i should fall sick now, id embrace it. becoz i really need rest after much muggin'. Yet again, I cant seem to tame my wilful heart. Im always finding things to do and friends to have fun with!

fear no more

2007-04-05T23:41:00.000+08:00

I came upon these lyrics. Hands by Jewel.
Repost: Listen with your heart. God bless us; those with broken hearts.

If I could tell the world just one thing
It would be that we're all OK
And not to worry 'cause worry is wasteful
And useless in times like these
I won't be made useless
I won't be idle with despair
I will gather myself around my faith
For light does the darkness most fear

Chorus*
My hands are small, I know
But they're not yours, they are my own
But they're not yours, they are my own
And I am never broken

Poverty stole your golden shoes
It didn't steal your laughter
And heartache came to visit me
But I knew it wasn't ever after
We'll fight, not out of spite
For someone must stand up for what's right'
Cause where there's a man who has no voice
There ours shall go singing

Chorus*
My hands are small, I know
But they're not yours, they are my own
But they're not yours, they are my own
And I am never broken

In the end only kindness matters
In the end only kindness matters
I will get down on my knees, and I will pray
I will get down on my knees, and I will pray
I will get down on my knees, and I will pray

Chorus*
My hands are small, I know
But they're not yours, they are my own
But they're not yours, they are my own
And I am never broken

We are never broken
We are God's eyes
God's hands
God's mind
We are God's eyes
God's hands
God's heart
We are God's eyes
God's hands
God's eyes
We are God's hands
We are God's hands

I will get down on my knees and I will pray...
I will never be broken.

my heart might have been broken but my smile ain broke. am disillusioned no more & i won't idle with despair. the girl's released from a self-bound emotion.

for my friends: no worries, im okay now. be back to normal in no time. and this time, my smile's genuine (:

Friday and Saturday

2007-04-01T06:15:00.000+08:00

Friday and Saturday saw two different dates.

Friday: I wished we could meet up soon.... and soon will come. if it works out, it works out.

Saturday: I wished I'd never have to see you again! Your so cold, I dun know you anymore.

Tho' I was apprehensive about the sat date. i didnt regret i went. luckily he paid for my ~~expensive~~ dinner. if not, id have totally REGRETTED IT. feels kinda shiok that I managed to "cut his carrot" at our last ever date. I promise there wouldnt be a second one. Because of him, my life changed once. and its definitely gonna change again but for the better, after tonight.

to the 4 guys who were my knights tonight. arigatou. i will remember your kindness. =)

sakura chan... i didnt forget your birthday... included this photo because ive always loved sakura in this cute pink yukata. happy memories to you sakura! my heroine of all time, happy birthday~*

after reflecting (as I always do) : kinda tired being in the chase. needa let loose. so baby start the 6 weeks countdown.

haha.. okay.. just one more cam-whor'in picture .....my girl ariel

and one LAST *ugly* one. haha~

Beauty and the Bee

2007-03-27T01:02:00.000+08:00

Let me first thank my dearest childhood friend who most charmingly saved me (not my life) from a ..... bee... (yes, a bee) you might think im NUTS. but this bee with fur on its back nearly scared me to tears. coz 1st it stung me... and it wouldnt shooo~ no matter how i try to shake my coat. feeling SUPER helpless, i called my CHF who was already in the class which i was running late for. it didnt take long for him to "evacuate" Mr. BEE! URGH! i never knew i was that sweet to attract bees. HUH! so THANK YOU CHF!

-original paragraphs were removed by owner-

YES! there's nothing i cannot handle *smiles* and just like the Beauty and the Bee Episoda, im gonna be really cool about this; id rid the BEE myself next time.

when the going gets tough, the tough gets tougher!

GO GIRL!

im really happy that at least one of my guy friends remember his date! IM SO relieved!!! he texted me this very morning and asked me when was a good date. honestly, it had slipped outta my mind. Hurray! I cant wait for this to happen because he's actually the boy im ..........

so i wunt even feel sad for the other date on Sat. its a closure and it has to happen. I have to go and end all of this once and for all!

TMNT

2007-03-26T01:09:00.000+08:00

Jeezus Christ... felt like ive not blogged for a darn long time. anyways, its gonna be a long post... Now that ive warned you.... Heres my heros since my childhoodie days. *well apart from Mighty Mouse & Captian Planet* im a true blue 90's cartoonie fan, perhaps those that were shown in Singapore.

Half Shell, TURTLE POWER! *the new animated-movie TMNT*

I LOVE Leonardo the best. Just because he's the leader of the pack AND has 2 awesome blades across his shell! *opps! did i mention that i love BLUE too!.. haha.. overstatement* Gushed EVERYTIME Leo makes his appearance in the movie. "GO LEO GO!!!"

Here's a flashback of how their older version looked like.

I wonder why im glued to all this cartoons back then. Nevertheless... they were and still are my Heros! Oh! Little trivial about the turtles. THEY ARE MY AGE! How neat is that! Born in 1984 and drawn by this guy named Kevin Eastman.

Go catch TMNT now if you haven caught it. Only for reminiscing purposes coz the plot suxed. Raph is not LIKE that in the original version a'tall! He's cool! not stubborn stiff in the movie. AND HE WOULD NEVER FIGHT LEO! BOOOS to the Director of TMNT. Anyways, they brought my green heros back to life again. ahh well, arigatou!
__________

twas wz's birthday a week ago. a happy happy picture. *Did daryl put his hand on my shoulder?* cheers pple, we're geddin older.... love you laddies & ladies~ btw, many people have told me that I dunch look like me. SO HOW THE HELL do i look like or USED to look like? how thought provoking...

ive finally booked my plane ticket earlier this afternoon. ITS CONFIRMED. imagointoshenzhen! COWABUNGA!~~ Wunt be wailing... im dying for my term to end.. so i can finally work (for extra money) and get my arse outta SINGAPORE! my long awaited HOLIDAY cum INTERNSHIP is fast approaching. wotz more satisfyin IS... this lil'ger's paying this all by herself. YAY! hope id be able to make "make-ends-meet".

on a serious and depressing note. ive put on weight. URGH! i dun actually mind but its UNHEALTHY FATS! *due to eating comfort food* to get it all off, i ran like a mad mouse at the park near my house. feels darn shiok... i should really do that again.

you know diary, someone asked me about the B'G'R qns... and ive gave some thought to it.. the one for me that might be just be next to me in school. he's the perfect catch honestly. christian, tall, ambitious, cute, funny, warm-hearted, listens, laughes, poly grad (like me), down-to-earth, filal... ya-dah ya-dah... most imptly. HE IS OLDER and def much more matured then some of the guys i know in school. *if you are reading this and happen to be from my school and by any chance you DO KNOW me...please please please make me bump into him? Lolx... andaaa dun make me blush when you quiz me about this lad. IM SHY okay! Oh! and if you are God and you are reading this... i need something outrageous to happen. MAKE HIM FALL IN LOVE WITH ME.. Wheee!! Finally a proper and morally-right crush. a long awaited one indeed. I sooo badly want this... make it HAPPEN! dunch wanna fall in and out like a dumb dumb.

lastly, all the best for WEEK 13 Folks.. will make it past the presentations/report week and then lets embrace the exams. which means... IVE GOTTA GO STUDY FOR MY FREAKING CB TEST NOW! URgh~*~*~*~*

Tulips

2007-03-16T01:21:00.000+08:00

Have always loved tulips. be it buying them or receiving them. they smell sooooo nice.

you see, giving people tulips can brighten their day, shower some love or even express your thoughts! how nice.

recently, ive been manifesting alot of stuff (mostly in her mind). for example; chanting I WILL CATCH THAT BUS! or praying that MR RIGHT WILL APPEAR!

start spreeeeeading some lurrrrrveeee today!

thoughts & day summary

2007-03-10T04:26:00.000+08:00

"DMS has a complicated background." mund said.

not being useless + hopeless, perhaps its been such a long time. reminiscing his face. maybe because life's been stagnant. praying for a call that will make me skip two whole heart beats.

even tho' my hearts in two and are against each other; better off w/o him.

________

i like chatting with taxi drivers at night, most prolly they were bored. this auntie who spoke very slowly in child-like mandarin made me reflect on life. and what is life. perhaps life to her is always struggling to make ends meet. said she's been driving for 10 hours and having little money makes her miserable. why is it money? money can't buy you a healthy body or good health neither can it buy you eternal happiness. but w.o money; somethings are just impossible.

some of the questions she asked me which had me reflecting on life.

"how much does the boss of a bank earn?"

"how are you able to study in a university?"

"how much do you pay to study in a university?"

"what is a degree?"

"what can a degree do?"

"how much does a graduate earn?"

"what do you want to after you graduate?"

while comforting her mandarin, told her take care of herself and not be sad about money issues because there are more important things in life.

You will never be looked down upon by me. by asking me questions, you were ACTUALLY my mentor for 5 mins tonight. Thank you auntie.

_________

it saddens me that people cheat on their gfs/bfs. wasnt angry but rather sad. love should never be used to hurt another nor be used to cheat on the other who loves you. NEVER! why can't people see/sense/hear this? Was is greed or desire that made them change?

it saddens me that a friend of mine had lied. wouldnt be angry if he had told me the truth, yet he chose not to reveal. when i found out, felt blardee used. what is more disappointing is, i might only be a mere comforting toy. AND this made me miss DMS really really really bad. least he was brutal enuff and wouldnt do anything like that. not to me. i deserve more than that.

_________

Thanks to Friend Ivan. I did get to chill alittle today as we were invited to the Launch Party (by him) at ICE COLD (boss was super nice). Drank beer on Campus, chatted, played, laughed, chatted, drank and drank somemore, chat, laughed and laughed some more and laughed till my cheeks were sore. but all was good coz i met people. and this is what i learnt; "SAVE WATER! DRINK BEER!"

wanted to write more. too tired. meeting on a sat in school. have a life/get a life.

GOOD GRADES!

2007-03-08T00:02:00.000+08:00

I cannot believe ive got things of all sorts crashing on me.

GOOD GRADES.... GOOD GRADES!

hang on lay yee. there's 4 weeks left. We still can make it!

TWC
BP
FINANCE
CB

my favourite boys. and dun care what you think about them. im not going to back down. not now...

and before this slip my mind....

....

....

....

....

HAPPY 23rd BIRTHDAY !!!!
Clint
Bob
Dave

*big hugx big hugx* its been 9 years since Ive known you guys and Scott. Keep rwaking my world!

LOVE XXXXXXXX

laughter might be the best medicine

2007-03-05T00:16:00.000+08:00

Hana Kimi accompanied me during the downs and now at its ending, i kinda miss the story plot. really had a great time watching this unforgettable drama.

maybe it was zun whom I was secretly admiring *hush hush*

honestly, dun know why i felt the way i was feeling. but its all in the past now. only glad that i din give in to my weak side. (if not, i would have taken the wrong choice/path! Yikes!)

SO! let me say this... Thank you for leaving me, rejecting me, disappointing me, turning cold and ignoring me! THANK YOU! But from now on, im gonna pray for the right things can keep on believing and holding my faith.

im gonna embrace what I have now and manifest better and happier things in my life! Starting from now....Go Go Go!!!

was having a horrible migrane... however, while laughing & playing with baby georgina. Poof.. it disappeared! *was mistaken as her mum.. how cute!*

Dilemma : To be president or to pray that Id get my exhange next year? I only have one week to decide. WHAT DO I WANT!?! Urgh *_*

Movies Im dying to watch :

1. The pursuit of happyness

2. Letters from Iwo Jima

3. The Departed

4. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

5. The History Boys

*any takers?*

Quote of the day : Never fail to try again. you will only fail if you don't.

who are you thinking of

2007-02-28T23:29:00.000+08:00

Happy Birthday Blog. We have officially passed thee 1 year mark together.
Thank you for being my slient white paper.

read that lee hom wrote this song when he saw a young girl working at 7-11.

felt his voice running through my ear drums and and it touched my heart.

"who will give you comfort and understands you when you feel sad? who are you thinking of now? who will cry and face challenges with you when you feel hopeless? who are you thinking of now?"

DMS used to have an invisible sphere around him and a force that pushes me. when it started to crack, im left to fend for myself. Do I trust anyone enough to reveal my weakest side?

lee hom, your melodic voice brings me warmth, comfort and motivation.

our dreams depend on You and Me as we stand on the same platform. Should we cry, it will be tears of joy and achievement. We have to be better than before. So lets bring out our courage and face tomorrow's challenges.

plotting my route in china. the good news has yet set in. too much thought kills the brain cells. But I cant wait to lug my baggage outside Gloria's HK apartment and surprise her with a huge hug~

Father, can it be possible?

letter

2007-02-23T00:17:00.000+08:00

Dearest Lay Yee,

There are 3 things in life a person can't hide from. That is coughing, poverty and love. The harder one tries to hide them, the more they will reveal. However there are times you still want to hide them. I'd just sit and cry until I can't anymore. Love is a self-inflicted pain. Warmth and comfort comes from the love within. Although love comes to us in different ways, its all the same. There may be people or things you miss now and you may ask God why did he have to choose you. Philip Yancey said this, " Happiness recedes from those who pursue her. It will come up upon you unexpectedly as a by-product, a surprising bonus for something you have invested in. And most likely, that investment will include pain." Though some people stay mercifully free of acute physical pain, everyone has a form of suffering that will not go away. These words may just be a cup of sweet comfort. Cry if you must and I hope you find peace within you.

Love,
Someone who cared for you in the future

p/s : you have longer hair now.

Giraffe & Glass House

2007-02-22T00:38:00.000+08:00

the girl's back.

and her first time @ Giraffe with the fellow polyians.

blog's turning 1 soon
__________________________

Ever wondered how Mr Universe would look like? Here's my take. One who doesnt even need to TRY to look good (see below) im baffled at his charisma. should he stand next to me, id just butter into a pool. He definitely has the brains and the brawn. now boys....say "unfair"

(photo credits : wu chun)

absence

2007-02-08T09:09:00.000+08:00

due to personal unrequited issues, blogger has decided to take absence of leave for an unnotified period.

Tears in Heaven

being ill

2007-02-06T21:33:00.000+08:00

being ill is not fun. not now at least. i cant even sit nor stand. dying. my tests will not wait for me. i have to get better.

Dine out

2007-02-05T22:16:00.000+08:00

Tomorrow is the first and the last time in my life where I will be tested based on my dress code, how I eat and how I converse. Its pretty fun. But right now, Im feeling squirmish in the tummy. If I am tested on eating tml, and I CANNOT eat... how is the lecturer suppose to mark me? I think Velina will start penalising me. =(

I hope this tummy of mine gets better tml. Cant believe I have the same condition as my hamster hai. I never thought my tummy would let me down the night before my Dine Out and Quiz. hai. I should have an early night.

MLTR : Im Gonna Be Around (this song makes me feel better)

I wished you were with me now.

The Good Word by Barats & Bereta.com

2007-02-05T02:23:00.000+08:00

Gosh~~ This is bloodie HILARIOUS! If you met these boys, for christ sake JUST CONVERT! hahahahah!!

I'll do anything

2007-02-04T17:32:00.000+08:00

Jason Mraz - I'll Do Anything

Go make your next choice be your best choice
And if you're looking for a~~boy~~ girl with a voice, well baby I'm single

Are you in the mood for some dude, are you in the mood to be subdued

Or would you rather just mingle?

Let's get set then to go then and let us jet set we'll be like the jetsons

You can be Jane my wife.

Should I marry Jane tonight

I would if I could. I'd do most anything spontaneously.

Or we can keep chilling like ice cream filling

We can cool in the gang if you'd rather hang

Ain't no thing. I can be lugubrious with you.

I got no ifs ands ors no wits or whats about it

But this place is getting crowded and my house is two blocks away

Or maybe closer

I would if I could. I'd do most anything spontaneously.

You know I would, if I could. I'll do anything spontaneously.

If you could be nimble, you'd have it simple just like me.

So go on and try it, do not deny yourself your freedom.

So step on up to the plate get a date with ~~mraz~~ alaskie

See you better act fast because supplies they never last

Now did you know this is limited time offer

So go make your mind up before our times up

You better start winding it up because the party's almost over

(and if you should know ~~girl~~ boy, go a little bit lower now)

see how I would, if I could. I'd do most anything spontaneously.

You know I would, and I can prove it. I'll do anything spontaneously.

ONLY Mraz would use the word "lugubrious" in his lyrics. I reckon this is one of my favourite songs on his album Waiting for My Rocket to Come.

Im in total rhapsody! Kuroi had put on a little weight today. But his stool is still watery. Will you pray for my baby Kuroi please? This is the first time my hamster enjoyed EATING medicine. He almost bit off the toothpick which I used as a spatula to feed him. Im amazed and I love Kuroi.

Shopping is fun in a way. But shopping with new people and of the opposite gender is totally refreshing. Works better for me cos I love to browse men's clothes. Yet, I havent got any clothes for myself. Figured since Ive spent on my hamster's medication I wouldnt spent on clothes. Clothes are not as important as my hamster's health. Haha!! My mother would be damn happy if I didnt buy any, she's always saying that Ive got to buy another closet. Suddenly I realised being able to buy NEW clothes is such a luxury while thinking of my students in china. I wonder how they would spend new year.

Im waiting for Term Break. But before that I have to embrace my mid-terms (3 papers + Quizzes)

Its Friday!

2007-02-03T00:14:00.000+08:00

Twas a long day... but its FRIDAY! haha! Yet today, I OVERSLEPT for Kenneth's lecture~~~*YIKEs* Super Tired. But after a shower I felt better. So i decided to POST pictures! At the same time chatting with Uncle Gregy, Edwin(bugging him to pull in that cute guy; so Id join the team to Kunming) & Dominic(talking about Donuts). HA~ If Im in the mood I can be quite zi lian. (this means one who loves to take pictures of herself and smile at herself)

I realised some people can be quite critical of what others (including me) do, say or wear. Sometimes, I think people just too mean. We SHOULD ALL start giving compliments to each other. YUP! I will start first. Mean people just make a nasty world to be in. Admit that you will not want to befriend a nasty person. SO start being nice!!!

Had a nasty nasty dream. Awoken twice and crying. Tho' irritated, it made me cherish my Mother even more. I couldnt live without her, for now I know cant. So if God asked me to forsake BGR to take care of her? Yes I would, without any hesistation.

I reckon that all my girls look sooooo pretty~ ;) We had a wonderful time trying out colours and most importantly, having FUN!

Im happy that I grew "out" my short hair. Id be sticking to medium length for abit. I like the way it falls on my shoulders. *oh.. and a fashion tip for girls... DO NOT opt for rebonded hair.. its outta trend la~ Only if you have Zoe Tay's rebonded bobbed hair. Should you choose that style... I will understand that its for convenience sake.*

All You Wanted

2007-02-01T02:49:00.000+08:00

Michelle Branch : All You Wanted

I wanted to be like you

I wanted everything

So I tried to be like you

And I got swept away

I didn't know that it was so cold

And you needed someone

to show you the way

So I took your hand

and we figured out

That when the time comes

I'd take you away

Chorus

If you want to

I can save you

I can take you away from here

So lonely inside

So busy out there

And all you wanted

was somebody who cares

I'm sinking slowly

So hurry hold me

Your hand is all I have to keep me hanging on

Please can you tell me

So I can finally see

Where you go when you're gone

All you wanted was somebody who cares

If you need me you know

I'll be there

Oh, yeah

Chorus x2

I wonder sometimes whether its okay to be overly ambitious. *thank you Dominic, who reminded me of this wonderful song* . *thank you Friend Ivan for listening to my strange rantings*

I still dun understand why men chose to let me go for obsolete reasons. Oh well, they can wait for the grass to grow. One day, flowers will be waiting for me on the other side of the meadow. *Buddy Fariz, we will make it one day....we wunt give up*

Guess what'd be my bedtime story tonight? My FT lecture notes. Ive always wished I had an elder brother who reads bedtime stories to me and make me fall asleep. Its sad to know that I have an elder brother but he has never done stuff like that for me when I was younger. I miss that feeling. The only thing I remember was that he saved me from drowning when I was really young. I guess I would have ~~died~~ been gone if it wasnt for him. I could only recall this using my affective process.

SO... you know, life is bloodie fragile. I also remembered I nearly died bumping my head against the railings from an unintended fall; its not my fault, the person who was carrying me DROPPED ME. 2 more inches and perhaps a hole on my skull and a huge pool of blood. I had hurt my back then, and I was paralysed for afew seconds. See??? Didnt I tell you life IS fragile??? AND how many times, I didnt catch cars NOT stop at the traffic when they were supposed to? Gosh. Its scary even to write this down.

LIFE IS FRAGILE. Cherish it. And this makes some relationships insignificant. Dun think too much about insignificant stuff, they just waste our time. Agree?

No one can hurt me without my permisson

2007-01-31T01:17:00.000+08:00

"No one can hurt me without my permisson."

- Velina Collins-Loi

this was just to refresh my memory....

and well said.

Fridays

2007-01-30T02:24:00.000+08:00

Im always looking forward to Fridays.

Its when I can finally sleep thru Saturdays. (my favourite day of the week)
Its when Id be able to see Kenneth's really cute smile. (my twc prof)
Its when I can be detached from school for at least one day or hopefully two.
Its when I can daydream about other things; non-school related. Like having wings and being able to fly.
Its when I can go have a cuppa with some friends, if i have the time to spare.
Its when I can finally finally finally get to breathe.
Its when I can do what most people call it - REST.

God please be VERY nice to me. Im shivering with fear whenever I look at my schedule in Week 7. IM OVERLOADED! My cries for help are hoplessly drowning in vain. UNLESS my TWC prof decides to marry me and Id quit school to start a family! HAHAHAHAH! *okay okay, i'll QUIT daydreamin'.... its not Friday yet..... *makes a face : bleah* Im still catching up on his pre-assigned readings. Id need another bottle of chicken essence later. caffine, red bull if it doesnt help.

For Shahaizan Only

2007-01-29T12:33:00.000+08:00

Shah~ never knew you were so evil. anyways... lucky for me, he didnt follow me home... Kekekek~~~ You liked to see me and keymonk together huh??? You sure you wunt laugh crying? hahhaa~~~ Id bet my life on it. it'd never happen!!!! OH.. since you were interested to know whether he was looking at me? I wouldnt know???? coz why would i wanna catch him looking at me???

Perhaps Id like keymonk to change his gender preference for once and see him stalk you for one day. AND that is when Id get the kick of my life. HAHAHAHAH!

Thanks for going to the party. wasnt much a party but like a get-together. Yea pple Ive never seen for a long time. Like Wing Kei, Edmund Lim, Grace, Derek, ah pek, ...blah blah. So many guys there... Could literally count the number of girls there (including myself) with my 2 hands. -.-""" Pity, I was toooo shy to talk to anyone of them. hahahah~~~

Till then pal..... ^-^ without KM of coz.

Xiangbi Memories

2007-01-28T00:01:00.000+08:00

Kids from the window.

Our last night partying~

I dunno how to put to words how much I miss my kids from China.

How each of them gave me priceless happiness.

yes Helen, I do miss Yun Chen....

I miss each and everyone of them.

*photos credits : Clarence*

Missing someone can be a painful thing and I know all of them are waiting for my return. Please bring me back this year.

1000 things

2007-01-26T02:49:00.000+08:00

If you don't really like me being lyrical these days, Id apologise first. Oh well, when a soul yearns to sing, another singer will always have to do it for her. hee* I believed I did mention that Jason Mraz is a wonder with lyrics. I hope you do enjoy this one; 1000 things. Cheers.

"1000 Things"

I'm overjoyed and over loved and feeling lucky

Like a little boy who's hiding under covers

And looking to discover any way to play the part inside his darkened cave

Well the meaning of life it starts at the nightlight

Close your eyes and hope to see mine

Well I've seen a thousand things in one place

But I stopped my counting when I saw your face

Erasing memory I feel as though I've never seen a face before

Until I saw your eyes smiling back at me thru my tears

I've been counting all these years

Now suddenly the thousand things I've seen were

Nothing more than dreams of you and me

You and me quietly at a stand still

Fortunately you will kiss me and I'll kiss you back

Fact of the matter of is that I don't know what the latter is

That I always wanted to kiss you but I always wanted to run from you

Because I always wanted to miss you

And that I've always wanted to come for you

So... how do you do?

Reflection

Am I selfish too busy with my own life? Made my New Year Resolutions at the beginning of 2007 (over at Helen's hse) for the first time. Ive always tried to balance life (suddenly life becomes a huge word to comprehend.)Well, who can say he/she is the master of it all huh? I suppose some may think I'm nutty to be pushing myself. I cant force you if you dont. These days, a good friend is really hard to find, one who understands and supports without any conditions and grievances. how can one not be disappointed.

A side note, will you miss me if I were to be away for about 3-4 months this summer? Edwin and Ade are planning a trip to Kunming~~ ahhhhhh and Im SOOOO keen!!! Will see how it goes.... cant be too ambitious if I am packing quite afew things during summer break. AND I have yet overcome my MIDTERMS! YIKES!

Should I thank God that Im un-attached? Suppose I am attached, will he be able to support my decision to be away from home? Will I have to think about how it might affect the relationship? Will I miss him? How many "wills and what-ifs" do I have to think through? Gosh. What a brain-squeezer! Most couples will have a hard time.

I have a different solution. Should anyone be attached in this given situation. We just have to deal with it maturely. These things just happen, and if they do we have to accept it and deal with it. So the question is HOW to deal with it. Its not forever right?

Thank God, I still believe in love and I have a healthy body to bring me to places. Thank God, I still can see, feel and hear the wonderful things this life brings, perhaps not the same as anyone esle, but I appreciate what I have.

constructive discharge

2007-01-25T12:36:00.000+08:00

Taken from Love Story at Havard Episode 2 where Kim Hyun Woo (actor : Kim Tae Hee) absolutely nailed his Professor and I was left in awe.....

During Law Class

Prof. Keynes: "What is contructive discharge?"
*Hyun Woo raises his hand*
Prof. Keynes: "Ms Baylor"
Rudy Baylor: "Constructive discharge occurs when the employer/the company, forces their employee to resign by creating unfavourable work conditions."
Prof. Keynes: "What basis does the plaintiff have to claim on constructive discharge?"
*Hyun Woo raises his hand again*
Prof. Keynes: "Mr Hong"
Alex Hong: "The plaintiff claimed that the demotion was a result of the director of the department making his staff prepare reports that he is personally responsible for. He took a leave of absence and was not hired back when he returned."
Prof. Keynes: "But the defendant argued that the plaintiff had insufficient cause to claim constructive discharge. What can one say about this matter?"
*Hyun Woo raises his hand yet again*
Prof. Keynes: "Mr Grey"
Grey: "What? Err... I dunno..."
Prof. Keynes: "Can anyone in this class help this employee who got fired unfairly?"
Hyun Woo: If there is not enough evidence to prove the direct discrimination..."
Prof. Keynes: "Who gave you permission to speak?"
Hyun Woo: "We can prove the discrimination through indirect methods.
Prof. Keynes: "Stop"
Hyun Woo: "First of all, he needs to prove that he's a memeber of the group which is being protected.."
Prof. Keynes: "Stop it!"
Hyun Woo: "And then prove that, the execution of his work has had the employer's fair expectation and the defendant's committed hostile action and also found subsitutes for certain from outside of the group. As I studied this case, constructive discharge happens not only at the workplace. It's happening right now, even at this classroom where we are studying the wrong.
Prof. Keynes: "What do you mean by that?"
Hyun Woo: "I was accepted at Havard Law School through proper procedure and examination. Accordingly, I have my right to attend and express my opinon in classes I apply to. However you have been consicously alienating me from the class without any rational reasons, leaving me to give up my own right to learn. Should there be one reason for me to stay out of your class, you should reason it to the Disciplinary Committee. But, if it is not so, you should let me participate in the class so that I can practise my right."

Prof Keynes lowered his head and thought for a moment. He then gave a smile to Hyun Woo, picked up his hat and proceded to leave the class. Everyone applauded and cheered~~ for Hyun Woo of course. ;)

So, if you should have any claim to constructive discharge... use this. AND a lawyer for a husband shouldnt be a bad choice too. heee*

sick

2007-01-23T23:15:00.000+08:00

I feel like a sick person. I think the medicine's acting up and I feel drowsy now. But I have tonnes of work to do.

During Finance Break, Louis and I slipped away to see our school doctor for some medicine. The doctor was so efficient I was out in about 2 mins. Louis took about 1 min. And he asked me, "eh alaska, the doctor quite young leh... handsome anot?"

that made me laugh.

Give Thanks.

2007-01-23T00:37:00.000+08:00

I wouldnt know how it feels to have an illness or perhaps some earth shattering news would befall on me. I wouldnt know how it feels to lie in a hospital bed all day and night. Given that I have fear of the dark, I wouldnt know how to survive that cold place. I wouldnt know that my health and my blessings were filled to the brim. I wouldnt know Im one of the lucky ~~bitches~~ few who have the chance to live on to tell the tale. I wouldnt know that just a bump would end your frail life. I wouldnt know life would be much much sweeter if I had put on a smile in everything I do. I wouldnt know that loving someone could be so painful. I wouldnt know someone was suffering to provide for what I have today. I wouldnt know that someone kind could say something to make me cry. I wouldnt know all that, would I.

Give Thanks.

**despite what happened this nasty sunday, I will go on smiling.**

Spring Clean

2007-01-20T22:41:00.000+08:00

What to spend a Saturday than to do COMMUNITY SERVICE! Tho having serious lack of sleep, I was rather elated to go down to Geylang East Old Folks Home. We diligently cleaned and wiped every surface in the area (esp the fans, chairs and tables). After we began hanging CNY Decor. It was real FUN! Next week we will be interacting with the old folks and we'll have most of the Board Members coming down (including myself). Im really blessed to have great friends to help out when I asked. Shuang Han, Gillian, Ariel, Daryl, Jin Han, Helen, Ivan etc.... So thankyew you! (Jin Han, your lameness in emails do not give you any excuse for not turning up okay! haha*)

I am embarking on an even fruitful life!

My plans for the rest of my days in SMU will be an International Exchange to Hong Kong (Hopefully... I dun mind an European Country if you liked to sponsor me some mean green hee*), Overseas Internship to either Shanghai, Beijing of Hong Kong, and chionging summer terms like a chao mugger. Im still undecided whether I wanna run for the Board again next Semster when I don't have much time considering I need to work as well. Pray all goes MY WAY! God's taken many things from me and I hope its about time he gave them back with better replacements.

I attended the BBM Internship Briefing on Friday and was wonderfully surprised to receive a certificate (bearing my name) and a passort. Although I was alittle livid about the way they spend my dad's money, Im still glad. This varsity MEANS business and HOW we do stuff makes that very difference. *winks*

So watch out for the little girl with nimble feet.

By the way, I realised something very important. This is my life and this is my blog. Meaning, I LIVE MY LIFE THE WAY I WANT IT and I WRITE HOW I DESIRE. I must'nt be swayed by negative thoughts/comments. Negative people please do yourself a favour and fug ooph~

Mostly importantly, I inspire to be a role model for someone. Even if its just one 13 year girl or boy. I will thank God for that.

Gone Wrong

2007-01-19T23:05:00.000+08:00

Thanks to Nabeel K for the lovely video he took. I love the rendition Eric Clapton performed that night. Wonderful Tonight. Completely serenaded.

I didnt know there was such a beautiful song which describes how I really feel. Here's Stacie Orrico's Im not missing you. Its been on the radio for a while, yet Ive never been able to listen to the lyrics carefully. So read the lyrics after the video. Im not missing you coz Ive got lots to do.

been through just about everything
that i could go through when it comes to relationships
dont know what i was missing or why i aint listen
when i told myself that was it
but here i go hurt again cause
of my curiosity now that its over
what else could it be
besides a cheat

i made a promise
never to settle (why didnt i keep it)
cos i needed the heart break
cryin and cheatin the fooling around

but im not missing u

Chorus
im not going through emotions
waiting and a hoping u call me
im not missing u
u mighta had me open
but i must be goin because
i got lots to do
i know im usually hanging on
i used to hate to see u go
but this time its different
i dont even feel the distance
im not missing im not missing u

its a shame in a way
cos i feel that i may not
ever fine the right one for me
did i leave him this year
i didnt find a face oh
will my true love ever be
how could i go on a search again
when i know what the end will be
what good is love when it keeps on hurting me

i made a promise
never to settle (why didnt i keep it)
cos i needed the heart break
cryin and cheatin the fooling around

but im not missing u

Chorus

no i cant be with u cos
im scared felt like i was falling when u left me
i cant keep going through life
unaware of what im missing
or the person that i could be
loves good when its right
bad when its left
in ur memory all the time anytime
i guess love will be nice for someone
this is life

im not missing u

Chorus X2

In real terms, I have a life even without you so you can go Fug Ooph. And to others like Casper the Friendly Ghost; I really appreciate what you've done. But in fact, what you have done was based on the Theory of Influence which I did not intentionally passed on to you. So.... I dun feel that great actually. Because I rather receive love in its natural form. Nonetheless, thank you. And although I can never really get to verbalise this, I do love the company of friendly ghosts. =)

Being in varsity means Ive been squashed among the best of the best, the cream of the crop and and the roses amongst the flowers.

My heart's in two and my mind's in six. Since I have a good threshold for stress, I seldom display my emotions and I tend to keep them in. You really do have to make me cry (literally) to force to me to say anything.

Whats gotten into me this week. I left two MOST important things to me in campus. And on both occassions I had to RUN back to get them. Fortunately, they were still there. THANK GOD! man..... what is wrong with me. hell~

I need to reorganise. I need to recollect. I need the love of friendly ghosts (which I fuggingly cant seem to explain) I need to find myself and be myself. (which means if I have to be more aggressive-looking and that I might scare any male counterparts outta their socks, so be it.)

Lastly, Prof Kenneth repeated my name three times in class today! Heeeee* Did he remember my name? He has a tummy flu~ I hope he gets better =)

HAPPY 27th BIRTHDAY BRO~

cold

2007-01-16T02:46:00.000+08:00

Perhaps its better being alone. I can't ask otherwise.

Recently, Ive been feeling cold outside but never on the inside. Yet tonight , I felt how it was to be cold on the inside and outside for the first time in a while.

Tears in Heaven fits the mood now.

p/s : Those guys have already sent me the photos. On second thoughts, I'd keep them private. I cant see any reason to post them.

Eric Clapton

2007-01-15T06:37:00.000+08:00

I spent my weekends working. Was super excited on Saturday (not because I had FT make-up class at 830am) It was Eric Clapton's return to Singapore! (after 16 years) It was a pity he didnt belt his hits "Tears in Heaven" or "Blue Eyes Blue" or "I Shot the Sheriff". I personally liked "My Father's Eyes".The ensemble performed mostly their solos. You feel the twanging of the electric guitars, the jazzy keyboard and piano keys, the bluey bass and the melodic accoustic guitars.

If I were the audience, I would have danced to the music. Although my work had some restrictions, I was glad I enjoyed the concert. ^-^

*wonderful tonight*

I came home without dinner so I got Macdonald's Take Away at 1145pm. The Prosperous Burger Meal was no joke. I had a hard time swallowing that black pepper chicken burger down my throat coz it was TOO hot! (in terms of peppery spicy hot) Least the potato wegdes provided some "comfort". Hahaha! *contented*

Spoke to JW on the phone (near Sunday midnight) coz its the lad's birthday . Apparently he was having a blast at some expensive hotel. *ahem* without me in the FUN. Nonetheless, HAPPY 23rd BIRTHDAY JUN WEI!

Sunday's DUCKie tours was okay. Slow. Rainy. I really felt unwell coz I was drenched for a bit in the rain (it wasn't a choice) and then back in the air-con. So tell me, how can I not fall sick??? I got so cold I had to put on a jacket (zipped up) during my last tour at 6pm. I HAD to wear something extra.

Here's something interesting worth mentioning. There were these 3 korean guys on one of my tours. Didnt took much notice of them coz they were seated beside me. ( I cant really turn my head 180 degrees, so my view is kinda limited). One of them made a joke; "You can blow your duck whistle and jump off the boat" So I replied to the rest of the passengers; "These guys are crazy! They want me to jump off the boat... So this is how much you "like" me huh!" and I gave them a frown & disapproving look. The whole boat laughed. *argh* (anyways I wasnt really offended)

When were alighting at the dock, one of them approached me to help take pictures. Its okay, coz its part of my job anyway. Tourist usually like me to take photos of them with the DUCK as the background. AND SO THOUGHT that was their intention. But no. I was the "attraction". They wanted to me to pose with EACH of them. *urgh* Alright, taking pictures is okay but i was uncomfortable with their jeerings. (HELEN! what's wrong with KOREANS!) One of them actually surprised me when he had put his arm around me. *my smile broke* Im fine with guys taking photos with arms ard me BUT its not a given privillege. My Captain even commented; "They like you leh" *I nearly fainted* Fortunately, it was done within a couple of minutes and after thanking them for joining Ducktours, I quickly set off to hide behind the Duck counter. Anyways, one of them asked for my email so they could send me the photos, Id post them up should I receive anything from them.

What a Day...

And I will begin a busy and horrid week in school. When I mean busy, I MEANT BUSY. Im dying wondering whether I could finish my assignments and readings in time. *sad face*

But knowing me, Im sure to slip away from studying and go out to play. HAHAHA!

Oh.. and i wrote this at 6.37am. (-_-"')

Ethnography @ FLOW

2007-01-12T22:27:00.000+08:00

Im always super distracted during kenneth's lecture. Esp when he looks at me and smile. crap. Its not fair. WHY is he this young with a PH.D and MD from MIT??? -.- UNfair.

It was raining mad cows and donkeys ydae and it continued to rain mammoths and elephants today. The weather was so bad I thought I was going to be trapped in sch. As I absolutely need to do my ethnography site observation today, I HAD to leave. So I decided that it was me and my puny yellow umbrella against the Mammothy rain.

Fortunately I met Clarence, Joe and Gabriel outside the barrigates of LCKSB and "Old Man" Gabriel sheltered me to the bustop with his BIG BIG umbrella. (THANK GOD FOR GAB!) Heeeeeee* its nice to know more pple, esp the opposite gender for THIS VERY REASON!

I found Vicky's shop without much effort. Chatted, observed and took photos. Just the girly chat. The lady boss of FLOW was super nice coz she let me try on her merchandise and took photos of moi. HAHAHA! I have NEVER in my life tried to wear anything related to HIPHOP OR R'N'B. However, I was pleasantly surprised. This is how I look in two outfits. *blush blush* I prefer the lady look (with killer 3-inch heels) on the right. It fits me better, don't you think so? =)

I tried on a very flattering dress which showed my shoulders right down to my plunging bustline. hahaha~ sorry guys, I wunt post such a photo of myself here. *sticks out her tongue* I love that dress to the core!

Thanks VICKY! *hugs*

And may I add, this bloodie weather is making me cold and unwell. My fingers are cold and numb as Im typing this. I hate it. How I wish I could have some home-made-soup-delivered to me. Pretty Please?

Well, you wun't even care if I were sick, wun you.

revisit sg poly

2007-01-11T19:10:00.000+08:00

I went back my to old school. How reminiscing. Shall let the pictures do the talking....

>SPSU. The place where we took crazy photos and do stupid stunts<
>Foodcourt 5 where we held our meetings, celebrations, gossips, slacking<
>The big green field. You bet its all coming back to me<
>It was pouring like mad cows and donkeys<
>I had to cancel my ethnography site observation. *add-in-a-cuss-word-here*<

2 years ago, I gave Ms Wang a Teachers' Day card and a small bouquet of flowers. HAHAHA! and its still hanging ard in her office. LOOK!

Ms Wang is having her 3rd baby and the little one is due in March!! Such a pleasant surprise!!! hahaha Brian and Andrew will have another brother!!! ^-^ Im so happy for her! and if coz I will have another baby to play with!

Be having lunch with her soon. So if you want to tag along, let me know yea.

Super proud that I was a graduate from Singapore Polytechnic and I have NEVER regretted my decision to spend 3 years there.

Why?

>I met the world's bestest friends there. *hugx*<
____________________________________

Could never be happier. Id like to keep it this way. Please don't change a thing.

Closer

2007-01-10T22:37:00.001+08:00

Bits from the movie; Closer

Larry: Don't move. I wanna remember this moment forever. First time, I walk through the door, returning from a business trip to be greeted by my wife. I have, in this moment, become an adult. Thanks for waiting up you darling. You Goddess. I've missed you.
Anna: How bout some tea?
Larry: Jesus, I lack it.
Anna: Did you sleep on the plane?
Larry: No, because the perv german sitting next to me was snoring like a message mat. What's the time?
Anna: Er... about midnight.
Larry: Time. A tricky little fucker. My head's in two places, my brain actually hurt.
Anna: Do you want some food?
Larry: No, I need a bath.
Anna: Id run it for you?
Larry: No, I'll have a shower. You okay?
Anna: Hmmm... How was the hotel?
Larry: Someone told me that the people at the paranoid hotel, the concierge, the bell boys and girls, they're all whores.
Anna: Everybody knows that.
Larry: I didn't. I suppose you fancy a friendly poke?
Anna: Just had a bath.
Larry: Rite, well Id see it to myself then; the ell decoration bathroom.
Anna: You chose that bathroom.
Larry: Everytime I wash in there I feel dirty. Its cleaner than I am. It's got attitude. The mirror says, "Who the fuck are you?"
Anna: And you chose it.
Larry: Doesnt mean I like it. We shouldn't have this.
Anna: I hear middle class guilt.
Larry: Working class guilt. Why are you dressed if you just had a bath?
Anna: We needed some milk.
Larry: You okay?
Anna: Hmmm...
____________________________________________

Dan: This will hurt. I've been with Anna. We've been seeing each other for a year. Began at her opening.
Alice: Im going.
Dan: Im sorry.
Alice: Irrevelant. What are you sorry for?
Dan: Anything.
Alice: Why didnt you tell me before?
Dan: Cowardice.
Alice: Is it because she's successful?
Dan: No, its because she doesnt need me.
Alice: Do you bring her here?
Dan: Yes.
Alice: Din she get married?
Dan: She stopped seeing me.
Alice: Is that why we went to the country? Celebrate our 3rd anniversary? Did you phone her? Beg her to come back? When you went for your lonely walks?
Dan: Yes.
Alice: You're a piece of shit.
Dan: The exception is brutal, but Im not pretending otherwise.
Alice: How. How does it work. How do you do this to someone. Not good enough.
Dan: I fell in love with her Alice.
Alice: OH, as if you had no choice? There's a moment, there's always a moment. I can do this, I can give in to this or I can resist it. And I don't know what you moment was but I but there was one. Im going.
Dan: Its not safe out there.
Alice: Oh, and its safe in here?
Dan: What about your things?
Alice: I don't need things.
Dan: Where would you go?
Alice: Disappear.
_______________________________________

Anna: Why are you dressed?
Larry: Because I think you might be about to leave me and I don't want to be wearing a dressing gown. I slept with someone in New York. A whore. Im sorry.
Anna: Why did you tell me?
Larry: I couldn't lie to you
Anna: Why not?
Larry: Because I love you.
Anna: Its fine.
_______________________________________

Closer: Its a beautiful movie. and I like it very much. Yea, maybe because Julia Roberts in it. :) and perhaps a little bit of Jude Law.

Can you believe this? I just had and finished my dinner. 1037pm. Amazing.

On my way home, I was thinking about something deep on the bus. Negotiation. If I were to ask him out on his birthday, that would be a very bad move on my side. Even if I did, Id have wasted my BATNA. Consumer Behaviour would tell me that consumers sometime make irrational decisions. And EVEN if I did make the intial offer, how would I justify it? I know I can't. Why doesn't this FEEL like a compatitable negotiation. Crap.

So for GOD's sake. Just ask me out and Id, shamelessly, say yes.

UPDATE 20070115 : He didnt pop the question. Anyways I was too tired to move. (Just as excuse for myself) I wasnt sad nor disappointed. Ive seen the bigger picture. My need was actually a want.

Anna: How do you feel while he was writing you in his book?
Alice: Thats none of your business actually.

Finishing Touch

2007-01-09T20:00:00.000+08:00

I was wonderfully surprised to have enjoyed my first Finishing Touch class this morning at 830am. Before that, I was dreading this course. In my mind, "What FT lahhhh.... I thought Poly taught us Etiquitte already??.. Hai... another waste time course. why this sch wanna torture us. Shd have just gave us our bloodie exemption......"

I came into the class just minutes before she started*HENG I wasnt late, always hate 830 classes* Velina Colins looked nice.. not the sort who'd scream in your face. As she chirped along from 830-1145am, I asked her one question, "Do you think that a degree is needed for someone who's going into the entreprenurial line." The fact that we are already in uni, doesnt give us much choice not to take it. And perhaps she brought up that between a diploma holder and a degree holder, a dip holder wouldnt go as far. I'd would beg to differ. So I replied; "There's always exceptions to the rule." Having a image of Gloria in my mind is so comforting. At any time any potential employer would give her the green light. So "scared what" if you are only a diploma holder? Just as long as you continue to pursue exposure and increase your skills, there's not doubt you will "lose out" to a degree holder.

"Bullshit.... This stupid girl is telling me that a diploma holder is ok WHILE she is an undergrad", you might be wondering. Yea... even tho' im a deg holder (going to be i hope), I was a diploma holder. You could say Im an advocate of diploma holders (not everyone, only those with the real ingredients) If you want me to discuss why I decided to pursue a degree, it would lead to another topic altogether. So I'd leave it as it is first (until some thought-provoking prof reminds me of it hahaha~)

ANYHOWS....... Yes, I wanted to share what I took away from Chirpy Velina's lesson.

1. Sailing or Drifing. Are you sailing or Drifting? Although the word's definition is rather straight forward, to most of us, these 2 words are rather intimidating. Crap. Are you sailing to a destination OR floating along to where your friends so-called destinations are? They have very different ends in mind. (as described in the book; 7 Habits of Highly Effective People) Do you begin with an end in mind? =) That is a very important question everyone of us to think and start taking action.

2. What are your limitations? Is it lifestyle, family, friends, boyfriend or girlfriend? When Velina brought this up, it practically stunned me. "Something's gonna give. What are you gonna compromise?" Its sad that we cant have everything in this world. And worst of all, I hate to be undecided of what to do and kept thinking about "what ifs". Still *wth*, I go back and forth in a cycle. I said that Ive given something up something impt. so THATs gonna give. I dun mean to intimidate anyone honestly, I dun even wanna be a career bitch (babe-in-total-contol-of herself). NLP presuppositions will tell me that My Map is Not the Territory, and that we always have to think bigger than our mind map. Given my current environment and resources, I can only achieve this much. BUT WHO KNOWS about tml??? My map may change and I wunt need to give up that something anymore. ;)

3. This one is simple. "Are you greedy enough to go up the ladder?" Its a plain yet thought provoking question. A male friend once shared somthing with me when we were as Freshmen, "Alaska, its always how much you want it. You can always have it. Question is whether you really want it." Want is a big word to chew.

FT has bloodie 20% class participation. You need to be heard in class. And I learnt that I could actually learn something even if I had to take that course again. Good for me. =)
____________________________________________

Good Luck to Louis, Ivan and Daryl for tml's Loreal's Biz Challenge Presentation. Honestly, I hope you guys get thru. HAHAHA! *winks, then I'd have free drinks*

I hear my darling Nego and CB is calling dearly for me to go flip their pages. So I have to exit.

Ciao~

yes, i swear

2007-01-08T21:06:00.000+08:00

I have a tendency to swear. YEA hell I do. Perhaps not in your face. well yea, so what do I cuss about? You dun wanna know.

So when did my problems become your problem huh? You guys watched Good Will Hunting? Written by Matt Damon and Ben Affleck back in 1997. hell old 9 years ago.

Will's a boy who believes in solving his own problems. hell yea, he has lots! Abuse, Assault etc. He's the brainy kid who was in and outta kids jail. Who would know he had to be forced to see a shrink to realise somthing so important to him. He's a lucky s.o.b. Do you hear what Shawn said to him? "If he doesnt wanna talk about himself, no one can make him. And if you push him now, he is going to go into another cycle again."

Bottomline : Dun bullshit me with your crap seriously. My deal with you is done. Well, if you dun understand me, just leave me alone. I dun owe you any bullshit and dun even try. I can be horrible girl. So dun make me go that to that, you prick.
_________________________________

School's fine, perhaps im packing more readings now. I wunt settle for sucky grades this term. Even tho' I gave up on something(impt), Im gonna work hard on every other stuff. I wunt cry because it wasnt given or granted to me. Id just take it and then leave. If you dun realise it soon, its gonna be your loss, not mine.

For some lighter stuff........ *ponders* there are none actually. Its Monday and I havent been sleeping well since.... wtf is wrong with my "sleeping cells". Ivan Chia always tells me; "Its gonna get better." Well, I do hope it does.

perhaps, ive just written this on a bad day, shame on that.

Runaway

2007-01-08T02:45:00.000+08:00

Its so typical. One minute Im upset and the other Im happy. One minute Im gay and the other Im pissed. Why are You testing me sooo much today. Im absolutely not having a mood swing, for christ's sake! Its circumstances that You've put me through. Ive told You. I have a weak and small heart. Why are You doing this anyways.

For whatever reason, I have already decided to runaway. Run far far away.

P/S : Nope, Im not escaping this time. =) And I really like the vidz in B/W. Brings out the feeling.

Guns, Germs and Steel

2007-01-07T01:45:00.001+08:00

Friar Vicente de Valverde, a priest on behalf of the Spanish Conquistador Fransico Pizarro under the rule of the Holy Roman Emperor Charles V, addressed Atahuallpa, the Absolute Monarch of the largest and the most advanced state in the New World. - 1532.

"I am a Priest of God, and I teach Christians the things of God, and in like manner I come to teach you. What I teach is that which God says to us in this Book (aka The Holy Bible). Therefore, on the part of God and of the Christians, I beseech you to be their friend, for such is God's will, and it will be for your good."

What interest me most is that Pizarro was the first conquistador to extract history's largest ransome in return for Atahuallpa's release. The gold taken was enough to fill a room 22 feet long by 17 feet wide to a height of over 8 feet. Pizarro reneged his promise and executed Atahuallpa in the end.

How did Atahuallpa lost to the Spaniards??? This is something which made me wonder in amazement yet simple to comprehend. History may not be that dead afterall. Thats where Guns, Germs and Steel came about.

I may also want to be married to my studies, work and even books. IF that is where my priorities lie. My poor weakened heart is unable to anticipate any more stress. I am also keen to understand the root of my confusions, doubts and entangled relationships.

Jared Diamond illustrated this beautifully in his book Guns, Germs and Steel.

"Understanding is more often used to try to alter an outcome than to repeat or perpetuate it. That's why psychologists try to understand the minds of murderers and rapists, why social historians try to understand genocide, and why physicians try to understand the causes of human disease. those investigators do not seek to justify murder, rape, genocide, and illness. Instead they seek to use their understanding of a chian of causes to interrupt the chain.

Hopefully HISTORY may be able to answer my never-ending doubts. Or God may like to do so Himself. I am waiting.

I would like to add that Ive been Stupified again. However there's this sweet old saying, 'If you know its not right, its not too late to change now'. And that is what I am going to do. To pause that chain reaction before I let it affect what is more important in MY life. Someone told me before, "Let go and Let God."

Yea and Im going to do that right now. LET GO. Sometimes, I just need to do what must be done. Id had my fun, my puntings and my crazy nights. I really think thats enough, enough for me to stay happy like I wanted. Before I end up slashing myself. (no unfortunately, i love my life too much)

Now to find another "fun", "punting" and "crazy night".

To Steph and PY : Im really glad you girls got attached to your darlings. Yes, S-Han & KB as well. Well, to the 3 couples! *hugx* Although I may "never" again experience how it would be like to fall in love, I love you girls to the last last bit okay! =D Steph, I'd help you "maw" him if need be and of coz S-Han will lend you her car : that's the ULTIMATE punishment already. HAHAHAHAHA!

Steph, I will NOT forget your-what-Cavewoman-crap. GOSH... that made me laugh soooo bloodie hard! If I feel like crying (like now), Id think about it for hard laughter. And yea, I know Im pretty. HAHAHAHAHA!

Thee Second Day

2007-01-05T00:37:00.000+08:00

Just like after a round of laundry cleaning, pilot's back from the clinic and got itself reformatted a.k.a ghostified

Its ONLY the second day of school and I look like I've been punched in both eyes. Got back 2 hours ago & feeling freak'in lethargic. To my amazement, Singapore Slingers won tonight's match against Townsville Crocodiles (Aussie). Anyways the scores were rather close and yesterday S.S. lost miserably to the South Dragons (Aussie). I dun think my work is worth any mention coz its just work. Same goes for the DUCKie. UNLESS~ something out of the ordinary decides to happen.

School as well.

I journeyed home with much anticipation but it died away when I got back to check my email. I was disappointed. So I asked myself a few questions to keep myself "in-check". Reflected about some stuff and realised Im TOO BIG hearted lah. I can make "you" feel as if "you" are the King of my World and I can even forgive "you" for your past mis-deeds. My buddy mund once said this to me: "Time loves to make a joke out of us". I could never disagree to that. Yet time seems to be the crucial factor here. Can I wait? My girlie pals will kill me if I break my rule: waiting equates foolishness. Just to set the record straight, Ive already dumped DMS outta the window in 2006. No more DMS in 2007! Hooray!

A friend shared something which I (and only me) thought it was hilarious. She said that it is because we females lack this male hormones in our bodies, we have outbreaks on our faces. AND hence it is encouraged (not by her of course) that girls should bed their partners to be pretty; thus the so called male-hormones can be transferred to the female body. Hmmmmm.... if Prof Nowaki were to listen to this, he would agree with me that this is fallacious. My face looks okay, does that mean I bedded anyone?? I would beg to differ. Although there might be some auntie saying behind it, I rather believe that its the state of the mind. Like when people say that you look prettier when you are in love. Its true right? Or that when we are happy, we smile. Its like cause and effect kinda thing.

Well at least for me, Id appreciate that comment. "ALASKA! You look good!" Oppx.. that reminded me of Abel's comment. SO guys dun sting on your comments towards ladies!! Make sure you shower more on me. Heeeheee~

I want to be happy & I want to stay happy. It is something only "you" have that honour to give. Others, Id have to bitch it for myself. So baby, please don't let us down.

Discovery of the lost Articles

2007-01-02T15:44:00.000+08:00

Was clearing my room and I found two interesting pieces of articles which Ive dutifully kept for 3 years.

The first is this :

10 TRAITS

1. HAS A LIFE OF HER OWN
2. NEVER MAKES THE FIRST MOVE
3. SEXY WITHOUT BEING TRAMPY
4. WAITS TO HAVE SEX
5. DOES LITTLE THINGS TO SHOW SHE CARES
6. BOYFRIEND'S BEST WING WOMAN
7. NEVER TURNS ON THE PRESSURE
8. DOES NOT TAKE ANY CRAP FROM ANYONE
9. ALWAYS CHOOSES A GOOD MAN
10. LOVE IS THE BIGGEST PART OF MATING EQUATION

I forgot what did that article had intended to put across. Does sound quite ego-feminist yea?

The next one is this :

THE ART OF FLIRTING by Jermiah Bullfrog

There is nothing wrong with flirting, if the both of you know where you stand and that nothing will ever develop from it. Many people would disagree. Flirting, to them is a dirty word, surreptitious activity engaged in by people intending to carry out secret fantasies and desires.

I disagree.

At worst, true flirting lets attractive people show their attraction to each without walking into a minefield of possible double entendres and forbidden amour. At best, it is a wonderful art form, and it revives one's self-confidence and ego.

It can take very simple forms, from simple compliments to casting an appreciative eye or the mere raising of an eyebrow. All without drooling, of course.

Or it can be a little more complex.

One of the best compliments I've received was from a woman who told me that she would marry me, if she were single. I was, according to her, the kind of guy she'd marry without second thought.

Permit me to distinguish flirting from outright harassing or crude propositions. Flirting is NOT walking up to someone and saying: "You turn me on, baby!" or "If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?"

If you are overt, you are crude, not classy.

Flirting is necessarily gentle, and hints rather than blurts outright. It is not an expression of raw animal attraction but rather a little reminder that you find someone attractive, and want him to know.

"You know, you have a nice smile. You ought to show it more often," is a good example. It basically says you find the other person attractive but doesnt suggest any sort of preposition attached to it. And it will almost always bring out a smile.

Above all, a true flirt knows when to step back when the other party is not receptive. So, are you smiling yet?

After reading and typing it out, I realised why some people just makes me smile =). Well, we all now know why Keymonk is seriously lacking in flirting skills. LOL! please shah.. nuff about me and keymonk... IT IS NEVER GONNA HAPPEN! >>> His "hey you are gorgeous and how nice if you were my girl friend" totally puts me off. period.

If this article helped you re-define what flirting is, good for you (=

Below is something for me and only me to read. Just for me to smile and think about those times. (thanks to shan again ^-^)

Cheers to 2007!

2007-01-01T23:42:00.000+08:00

Its official. Year 2007 has dawned. With the beginning of 2007, Im glad I've rid an old emotion and found a warm one. There's a lovely song which conveniently worded what I need to feel, how I should feel and continue to feel. Yea... it sounds and feels funny to be finally on my way; moving on isnt soooo bad after all. *smiles*

Head Over Feet (first song on Sanus List)

I had no choice but to hear you

You stated your case time and again

I thought about it

You treat me like I'm a princess

I'm not used to liking that

You ask how my day was

Chorus

You've already won me over in spite of me

And don't be alarmed if I fall head over feet

Don't be surprised if I love you for all that you are

I couldn't help it

It's all your fault

Your love is thick and it swallowed me whole

You're so much braver than I gave you credit for

That's not lip service

Chorus

You are the bearer of unconditional things

You held your breath and the door for me

Thanks for your patience

You're the best listener that I've ever met

You're my best friend

Best friend with benefits

What took me so long

I've never felt this healthy before

I've never wanted something rational

I am aware now

Chorus

What took me so long. To realise something so important. But I am aware now. I know what I want now. If only you knew.

We had a wonderful countdown @ Helen's House with ZY & Shan. *pictures will be available soon* With wine, sweet company and warm emotions grasping our hearts, we raised our glasses and cheers to a happy new year. ^-^

Goodbye 2006

2006-12-31T19:33:00.000+08:00

Its 31 December and 365 days have passed our fingers like sand. Its been a fruitful up & down 2006. Many memories were captured in my heart and they will always be there. I have tried to be thankful in almost everything I have and encountered. Wrote my year resolutions; there was one which I penned with a heavy heart. However, I am determined to get over it =)

The last few days of 2006 were crazy... I hung out with friends everyday =) My Sec Sch (of 9 years), Poly friends (of 6 years) and Uni friends. I love everyone of you guys!

Was feeling bored in December hence I intiated a GATHERING for QUESTownians Alumni Year 2000. We went to Curry Favor & headed down to Minds Cafe. I guess all in all, it was a success! *applauses* To everyone who turned up; THANK YOU for making this gathering a memorable one!

We had the honour of having 3 couples at our gathering: Jiemin & Yee Eng, Hanjie & Evelyn and Edmund & Vicky ^-^

Our smiley smiley faces (=

Cheers People! More Friendship-Years to Come~ (credits: Shahaizan for the nice design!)

Not in picture: Edmund & Vicky

I have some vidz taken at Minds Cafe and so I uploaded them onto Youtube. *apologises for the weird angle... realised was taking a wrong angle & it was too late to change*

My Take On UNO STACKO~

Thanks to Shahaizan for that night. He gave me a safe ride to my destination but more imptly, he helped me put on and take off my helmet; felt like a baby tho' Hahaha!!! Yup, perhaps next time I shd wear a turban with no buckles no nothing. I can die laughing talking to you pal! hahaha~~~ We have to catch up again ya =) Sorry Shah~~~ I didnt post our pictures coz they were too ugly... (you too black and Im too white...) HAHAH!!! However, this is the ONLY picture I find passable...

Shah, thanks for being my crappy and best friend during our slacking 4A days. *HUGx* OH yea... shah.. there's no need for your relationship resumes lol! Im holding onto one right now but he doesnt know Ive selected him out of the lot. ^-^

Edmund, my best buddy... Honestly, I wouldnt have come so far if it weren't for your quiet support. I know Id have you to count on in times of need. Thank you for being there for me when I felt like crying. I also know you are rooting for my happiness. Im just waiting for that selected candidate to ask me ^-^

Thanks to you Junwei. You know what you've done and I need not say more (= *HUGx* I need your support alright? Even tho' 2 years kept us apart, we could still be like how we used to be. I really treasure that.

My best gal pals: Gloria, Felicia, Karen, Eve & my other girlie pals ... We've know each other for donkey years. Thank you for tolerating my nonsense, busy busy sch days, periods and your love, care and concern. You girls deserve the best! (thats why God gave each of you a great partner) Now, its me who He left out ;)

______________________________

Tomorrow morning, my best friend Gloria will be flying back to Hong Kong. I will really miss her. Later in the evening, Zhiying & I will be fetching Helen from the airport and have a really great countdown at her house! Its gonna be yet-another-girlies-stayover!

and Im off! Ciao 2006!

December Trails

2006-12-27T00:57:00.000+08:00

Just to clarify... Im am still (very much) alive and kicking. ^-^ No, I am not shutting down my blog (thanks to few for the comment). Im just taking a little girl's break from the world of blogging.

There's this saying : To rest is to travel a furthur distance.

Where should I start? Just roll along as I relate my December Story pictorially... *its abit long*

My first visit to Vivo City : Isnt it nice to see children playing around w/o any cares of the world, just laughing and enjoying themselves....

This is my good friend in Uni, Uncle Gregy. He calls me Auntie for some reason, hence the "nicknames".

At Ben's & Jerry's : He had the cone and Ive the cup.

I baked cookies. To lessen my chores, I bought a pack of "pre-mixed" batter. Too sweet for my liking. Baked to remind myself of how it's like to be a girl friend. Nice experience.

A day in Johor Bahru. Bought nothing but a cap. Wasnt a shopping trip anyways. Accompanied by Hanjie, Evelyn and Junyi. A pity I didnt take any of JY's photos. And that's the famous JB jam. Liked the walk back to Spore, I really do.

Was someone's angel cos I made a video and posted it on Youtube. Hugs for Jacey Campaign (click here for URL). I leave you to find the vid done by yours truely. I always believe small gestures go a long way.

While in the Mass Rapid Transit, I chanced upon an odd advertisment which goes like this : "BREAK THE SIGHT BARRIER - If your eyesight is below 500 degrees, you can apply to be a pilot. Its a career like nothing on Earth." Reminisced as I read those lines.

And so I went on a short getaway. Mounted two peaks in Malaysia. Twas BLOODIE cold but wasnt bothered about the wet weather. Went bonkers over Chocolate Mint Tea and bought 3 huge packs. The GREENERY was awesome from my resort's balcony.

Ai Li Tang ~ Love Hall. Such a beautiful name. I pondered while my parents shopped. A pretty white rose on our breakfast table.

Goofed around while waiting for our ride to town. Twas was so cold outside the lobby, I had to laugh.

Most people would have wrapped themselves silly. I was in comfy demin skirt, sleeveless top and a blanket-turn-scarf. Kindly remind me the reason WHY First World is the largest hotel in the world with the suckiest efficiency around?

Would have made little children cry if I stole their horsey rides on the Carousel. Hence, I could only stand and look on enviously... I declared the place a TOURIST TRAP and didnt do much shopping. Was observing the kids... how they would cajole their parents for candies and rides. Managed to catch Eragon at their cineplex.

Here's some pictures of the christmas trees I took. I even hugged one of them.
Happy Christmas....

Singapore Garden Festival : the flowers alone were soooo beautiful. Together with the sweet smelling fragrance of the plants and water... It felt like I were in a Jungle! Had great fun.

Chilled @ Blu Jaz with Ericia & Gloria. YES! My best friend is back!!! Nice place with nice comfy furniture. Ericia had some nice pix on her blog too.

Our annual gift exchange.... Here's Our 2006 Christmas...

We have had 5 Christmas gatherings ever since 2002. This is the 5th one. SO much laughter SO much memories SO much warmth.

And some random stuff... Whenever I pass the CBD and the Fullerton Hotel, my mind will automatically switch to commentatory mode.

Id be meeting Junwei (hopefully), Shahaizan (my good friend), 2c and gang and finally a stayover & countdown at Helen's house.

Busy Busy DMS did not arrange another date as he promised he would. I wasn't that upset nor disappointed as I had expected this. He's been busy mugging and Im not faulting him for that. In any other case, I have to extinguish this foolishness of mine before 2007 crawls in. I realised Ive got his name down for 6 consecutive years. How amazingly Bakaa.

Id like an honest opportunity to see him one last time before 2006 closes in. Like those instances having the bare truth staring at you in the face, and finally you realise all you had was a dream. Perhaps with that, Id be able to pack whats left of those unneccessary emotions into a baggage and send them off to somewhere remote. Somewhere I wouldnt find them anymore. I wouldnt even pray.. praying for this has lost its meaning.

I'd be able to do it... Trust me on this one last time. You have got to give me all your support.

till then~ ciao~

bye

2006-12-20T13:29:00.000+08:00

Humour me. I beg of you.

break

2006-11-30T22:19:00.000+08:00

Please support Wakin by buying his original album as he sings with honesty and warmth. I like him to continue to produce good music and do believe his voice and talent is god sent. If you enjoyed the song below, do consider buying his album. Thank You.

I will not blog until I....

stop crying.....

stop feeling sad.....

and stop walking away.

I need time to understand that.....

"Adversity builds character"

Until He finds me hidding behind the door....

I won't be able to see my inner-self anytime soon.

and what if He doesn't find me?

Then I shall pray and find it out myself....

"No one knows what's best or what the future holds. Until you see the results, no one ever knows. So at the very least, why don't we rely on what we do know? Let's keep the feelings we have right now precious" ~ quoted from Takeuchi kun

jirou ga daisuki

2006-11-29T17:29:00.000+08:00

I have a few anime heros that I totally admire. To name; Hana Yori Dango's Tsukasa, CCS's Syaoran, Blood+'s Solomon & Haji and Inuyasha. I will add one more to my list of anime heros. Introducing Mochitsuku Jirou, a vampire who lived for more than 100 years. He appears as the main character in Black Blood Brothers.

I used to (and still) ~~love~~ have utmost respect for Tsukasa. In a way, I kinda make believe he came to life. In fact, he came to life! *ahemz* And I really really wished Jirou could come to life too, not as a vampire but as someone whom gives his all to protect. ;)

Jirou, you can drink my blood anytime you want *blush blush* coz they say its better than sex. *teehee*

my 1st paper's tml and my last paper's on sat. Gomen ne, doyoubi ni watashi wa asobi ku nai. doushiou? Shigoto desu! Sorry, I can't play on Sat coz ive to work at night. I guess id enjoy it cause it Emil's Concert. ;)

Jirou ga DAISUKI!!!

random

2006-11-27T23:41:00.000+08:00

I know this will sound crazy and passe (and random of course)

...........

im still gonna say it... ; )

I MISS YOU!

@>----

To my anime hero : Takeuchi kun. Go after Takahashi already for goodness sake! You love her and you KNOW it! And dun let Yano beat you to it again! Ganbatteyo!

Okay, Linda Zhang... I'll forgive you for your illogical usage of English. What's done cannot be undone. And that's that.

~*~*~ Christmas is coming~*~*~
and things are different this year, Im open for dates! Invite me if your having a goukon this christmas!

New song on the blog : Aeroplane by Apple Brown Betty

Caught a German Film on Central last night. And it was AWESOME! Titled : The Princess and the Warrior.

Game Theory

2006-11-26T01:01:00.000+08:00

Its abit "kuku" to write 2 entries in a day. But I have got to pen it down.

Was reading up on Nash Equilibrium and realised Channel 5 was broadcasting "A Beautiful Mind" So i spent 2 hours (without any commercials) glued to the google box. At the end of it, it made me appreciate his work and his struggle. Prof. Nash you inspire me!

I wish I have a chance to personally shake his hand. =) Send me to Princeton University and perhaps we could a game of chess? =)

OKAY! Now, Id have to get that DVD in December! *giggles*

Quotes from the movie :

"Are you afraid?"
"Terrified, motified, petrified and stupified by you"

"You are the reason I am. You are all my reasons"

"Eager young minds of the future...."

who draws the line then

2006-11-25T14:33:00.000+08:00

I realised most of us are like little kids picking out of candy shelves and stuffing them into our parents' shopping carts, having them to pay for it. Yea, we desire different things. Things that would make us happier. So who draws the line of being a materialist?

And so I checked up the word :
ma‧te‧ri‧al‧ist [muh-teer-ee-uh-list] –noun
1. a person who is markedly more concerned with material things than with spiritual, intellectual, or cultural values.

I was browsing the papers today and was shocked to see all the handphone adverts on every page of The Straits Times; almost blinding me. I caught myself checking out the prices and pondered whether I should change my handphone, knowing my trusty 2year mobile (protected by Abarai Renji & Shin) is still in great working condition! It took me almost an hour to figure I was wasting my time! So I shut the papers and wrote this entry. I personally do feel its nothing wrong with people wanting things. But when it comes to me; I would rather want different things. I want free and happy time to myself~

I always wanted to wander off, strolling through strange and old alleys and take photos of people, things and buildings. Id go where my legs take me. Hah! December is coming and 2 of my bestest friends are coming back to Spore! *hugs both junwei & gloria* And I want to meet up with them as soon as possible! But first, I've to get a gadget which im saving up for ;)

sick

2006-11-24T22:36:00.000+08:00

OKAY. Will Update.

I am feeling better. I didnt tell most of you that I was suffering from the worst bout' of cold and flu as I didnt want you guys to worry for me. ;) But thanks to all how who showed their concern. Honestly, I REALLY dread eating any form of medicine unless it is sweet. The FLU pills I had to take was horrible & yucky! Worst of all I had to swallow it. Man, i suck at swallowing stuff; i always end up puking them out -.-" BUT, I forced them in anyways. Spend the whole night tossing, turning and fighting the urge to puke out my medicine. God blessed my poor health. I said I wanted to be better, didn't I? *winks*

Half an hour more to my favourite anime: Inuyasha!!!!

Went back to QTSS to see Mdm Teoh and Mrs Yeung. Had some nice photos taken. ( you can view them in eve's blog) *giggles* While we chatted, the unbeatable qns popped out: "Ni you mei you nan peng you?" (Do you have a boyfriend) Lolx!!! I am super amused at that!

But I had to leave early due to a meeting in school. Sigh~ By the time I was done, I felt like dying and hurried home. While I was sick, my greatest companion was kuroi!!! He was so sweet to be with me while i was mugging and sniffing all the same time! He'd beat any guy at it ;) I LOVE YOU KUROI! He'll never bite or be irritated whenever I held him. Nice tempered hamster huh! (Ive trained him well!) He was willing to sleep with me too! *coooooos~~~ *You guys know I'd bring him everywhere! and I wonder why Helen calls him "G**gy" *shakes her head*

Revision was bad. Perhaps of my body condition, i feel sleepy most of the them and i cant really concentrade much. Anyhow I have to Ganbatte! Id do whatever it takes to finish my revision!!!

Oh! My brother's boss gave me a gift: The Full Edition OST of Notre Dame de Paris! Geee... the weird thing is that I have no clue how his boss looks like and how I am related to her! Anyhows... arigatou Ms Boss! *deep bows*

A French Spectacular

2006-11-18T23:49:00.000+08:00

My Reflections on Notre Dame de Paris

I feel somewhat like Quasimodo. Poor bell ringer of Notre Dame; he is the only one who truely loves Esmeralda. Altho Phoebus is cute, but he is one hell of a b*st*rd and ought to be killed. I really liked the song Esmerald and Fleur sang; Shining like the sun (their love for Phoebus). Follio is like a 2 faced freak; a priest yet a sinner (when he lust after Esmeralda's love)
Clopin is the hero! He protected Esmeralda and died after saving her from Frollo. And silly Gringoire did nothing but sang all the way. Not forgetting all the cute and fit dancers of NDP heee~~ and Helen said something funny which I HAVE got to write it down. "Asian's genes are cursed coz we dun look like Ang mos" Haha~ I just like the way she phrased it. cursed.

These are two of my favourite songs of the French Spectacular. AND im a fan of Matt Laurent ( he plays Quasimodo) **Note that the DVD version of NDP's Quasimodo is played by Garou and not Matt. I realised Matt has a deeper and huskier voice compared to Garou! haha!!! Of course Matt is obviously cuter!

...:: Danse Mon Esmeralda ::...

...:: Phoebus ::...

No wonder everyone says that french is the language of love. ;) It really brings out that atmosphere. Thank You Helen; for accompanying me to this wonderful musical =)

I leave you with a phrase Quasimodo said.... "Oh God, you made the world so unfair"

finelywired

2006-11-15T13:11:00.000+08:00

I realised that I am FINELYWIRED these days. SO Im contemplating whether to blog. Coz if I do, my poor readers will die of my never-ending flood of vulgarities. In fact, im only typing this to calm myself.

When I thought I was hopelessly down and broken, my spirits were lifted by his question. (identity is kept confidential at owner's discretion) "oh hey we should meet up for lunch...or dinner..." Im just not sure his "we" comprises which homo sapiens. Im sincerely hoping its just the two of us. Really.

"yasoku ne!" . "yup~~"

Im terribly happy because both of us are studying and are facing a freaking stressful period now. AHHH... finally we have a common ground. I was drowned with glee at that euphoric moment till a friend was staring at me like "im really losing it". (T.T)

Humming to "Dancing to the Moonlight" by Toploader. Im drunk. But I wun be having any hang over in the morning. heeeee~~~

I like to toture myself like this. Its really illogical. Edmund, I dunno how to help myself anymore. Or rather who can help me anymore. Im abandoned. Watashi bakaa mitai ne.

haunting bad days

2006-11-13T09:53:00.000+08:00

God......Daddy.... If happiness is like a barrel and you said it is always filled and spilling over, why do I feel like Im totally emptied.

alright, my presention summaries in one word :

SCREWED.

(its the whole context of the report) please god, dun let me face this word AFTA EVER IN MY LIFE AGAIN! as well as INTERNATIONAL ECONOMICS~ i beg of you...... and Im really on my knees. So many un-answered questions so many "whys" in my head. I dunno what to do now.

and Im facing one of my life's biggest challenge : To excel in my IE paper

im typing this in class now.... cold, hungry and upset. And our prof is asking us what kind of format we would like for the exams.... T.T Someone please kill me~ I wanna die~
"Prof! Can I DUN take the final paper? and still be awarded 30%?"

i dunno what to say now to make things better. I know I have to go through this 4 more times.

IN CASE you were wondering how screwed I was; YEA we might fail.

while "stress" last

2006-11-12T12:42:00.000+08:00

I hate to sound like a little girl panicking when the examinations are approaching. BUT then again; if I think about it, I will only have to PANIC "hopefully" 4 more times for another 2 years. AND THEN ITS OVER!!! You have to understand that this stress only happens to US STUDENTS.

For a LIMITED TIME PERIOD ONLY~

Perhaps after, we will have "work" stress to face. Nonetheless, by yours truely.

While working at SIS, I met Abel again. And he gave me a HUGE smile and wave and went "HEY Alaska! Looking GOOD today!" ahhhhhh~~~~ and that totally totally made melted my cold friday night.

COME ON PEOPLE! WHATS WRONG? Start SMILING TODAY!

a challenge to overcome

2006-11-12T01:16:00.000+08:00

Yesterday. I learnt a valuable lesson from a rainy day at work. Words cannot describe how I felt at that moment. I was soo stressed and after, my mood was like the weather (thunder and lighting with lots of rain) I wun detail on what happened. BUT Im still thanking God for people to help me out. Im not sure whether Id be in a bit of a fix later on, I will only know then. No point thinking about it now.

In a sense, I my stress-tolerent level grew a level yday. My emotional independence grew as well. AS much as I felt like breaking down, I didnt. I didnt even cry (im surprised at that) Although I wished I could share this emotional burden with someone, I kept it in. I would have loved to share it with someone, but its just not possible now. Lay Yee has to learn to be more independent and this is the only way. I wosh to be like other girls, running to their bfs and cry to them, having them to comfort you. But to me, its just not possible.

I cant pause and think of what happened then. I HAVE A BLOODIE PRESENTATION ON MONDAY! and im gg back to sch on a SUNDAY. I HAVE to think about my report and my presentation! Like what they sang in Moulin Rouge "COME WHAT MAY" I have to toughen myself and its such times, I musnt waver. I musnt.

*junwei thank you for your sms. It seemed as if you knew what happened, and your sms was there in time to comfort me. I guess God must have told you ;)*

My Favourite Cartoons

2006-11-08T03:22:00.000+08:00

Its so easy to love someone who is sitting near

But so hard when he's somewhere far away from here

I think you'd understand how it hurts down deep inside

To find your love, lose your love

Never to be his bride

Oh my, will I ever find

My Prince where can he be

He'll be always be the only one

The only one for me

~sang by Thumbelina~

%The NutCracker Prince%

"Ah hahhaa haaa...." sqeauled the Mouse Queen "Watch this! Not one of them will break this spell"

"Nuff' spells, spells, spells. WHO cares about SPELLS?" replied the son nonchalantly, " Now THIS!, this is TOUGH!"

"TOUGH? Ahahaaahaaaa...." laughed the Mouse Queen

"What did I tell you! Ive done it!" the Mouse Queen said delightfully, "and YOU my stupid son! You doubted me you stupid stupid stupid boy!"

"Ouchh ouch ouchhhhhh... MY tail my tail! My precious precious tail.. " sobs the son, "it's bend, it's all crooked and flat." " MOTHER LOOK! Look what you've done! Mumsie? MUMSIE?" "Huh! Mumsie! Your your your DEAD! Oh my poor sweet Mumsie, OH how I miss you~ Im all alone, just me and your crown~~~~" *ponders & takes the crown* "HAH! Im king, I AM THE MOUSE KING! HAHHHAAAAHAAA! "You and your stupid spells! That'll teach you!"

"That's a terrible story! Hanz should become prince of the land and live happily ever after." declared Clara.

"Well," replied Uncle Drosselmeier thoughtfully, "He is a kinda-of a prince"

"Hah, the prince of the dolls~" Clara blurted
Uncle Drosselmeier smiled "Exactly, and he will rule over the land of the dolls."

"If there is such a place and even there is, he'd still be a nutcracker." Clara replied

"No no No! The spell with be broken if he slays the mouse king" exclaimed Uncle Drosselmeier

"~~~and wins the hand of a fair young maiden" Clara continued

"Precisely............."

~my favourite cartoons of ALL time~
>>> and im not joking when I said ALL TIME FAVOURITE.

lethargic

2006-11-07T21:31:00.000+08:00

I feel like sleeping again. Id like to get my hands on Jimmy Liao's Artbook soon. He's drawings just make me happy.

8-8

I realised presentations are not scary anymore. thanks to my job. I delivered 13 slides under just 4 mins. wth. Ended with: "I have now come to the end of our presentation, we now open the floor for questions." hurray.hurray.applause.

8-8

yea, im sad at the fact that someone I love picked up smoking. anyone BUT her. God, Im praying for wisdom and her enlightenment. These days, young'ins just pollute other young'ins. I dun give a f*** with what you do with your lives. Just leave her alone. If you wanna mess around, f*** around, or even break some hearts, go find a bimbo. Dun let me see you alive on the streets. I might just strangle you on the spot. *growls*

8-8

I wosh my hair was dry. I wosh that I could draw as well as Jimmy. I wosh that I could fall asleep later.

{A Fish with a Smile was nominated for the 56th Berlin Flim Festival}

Id never leave you nor forsake you.

wosh

2006-11-07T03:45:00.000+08:00

Tend to blog at weird times of the night. But it really doesnt matter because Kuroi is awake and he's such a great company. *you see him nibbl'in here and there*

d'-'b

Saw this Indian security guard standing at the junction of PS's carpark entrance - near the roundabout for vehicles. Was observing how he was directing cars/buses/taxis + pedestrians all at the same time. He impressed me with his dedication to work. I noticed a couple making out while waiting for the bus as well. Young'ins huh. Then again, IM YOUNG TOO!

d'-'b

If the past tense of wish was wosh instead of wished; how cool that would be =) I just invented my own English word! Words are so interesting; so much so I like to use them in odd ways. Kuroi had cuddled up to sleep and I should cuddle up as well.

>> I wosh that ........ and I wosh that <<

_____ week

2006-11-06T04:37:00.000+08:00

Its really late, and I know I should sleep. Its all because of EXCEL!!! =(

>::::>

A friend called from overseas and confided in me. I really thought it was something that happens in shows or movies. And then it hit me that I was once a victim before. Its really unfortunate that when love changes and is not reciprocated, we have to respect that. I learnt it the hard way I guess. It the hardest emotion to experience, but we have to swallow it and learn somehow.

>::::>

Im happy that I am safe now, only because I chose to. I chose to guard my heart and wait for the man God has prepared for me to come along. I blame no one for this coz I told God I do not wish to cry anymore.

>::::>

Working is draining every part of me. Im soo worried, id not able to finish my QM Assignment & revise for Qm this THU. =( Id be presenting for MKTG tml. Its a tough week ahead!

Aja aja Fighting!!!!

>::::>

Btw, I gave those tickets to my Parents =) why? Coz its my Dad's Birthday and both of them deserved it! Simple as that. Honestly, I thought I didnt wanna write this down; Working on Sat was super lerthargic. I was like a bag full of gibberish. I hate that feeling when I dun even know what Im talking about. =( and I felt damn lousy. Perhaps sat was a bad day. Saturdays was suppose to be a GREAT day! But I really felt sooooooooo down.

>::::>

I should cheer up =) coz November's here! On a side note; though DMS is back, i dun get any vibe. (wasnt his safe return what I always prayed for?) I must be crazy. so crazy. delirious. and i shd sleep. good night~

Notre Dame de Paris

2006-11-04T00:56:00.000+08:00

Presenting : Gala Premier of Notre Dame de Paris at the Singapore Indoor Stadium

~^-^~

Honestly, you guys should watch this musical. Although its in french, the vocals and songs are FANTABULOUS! (they've got mandarin & english subs) Well, I caught some parts of it while working. Din manage to catch the whole show tho, due to my duty at the premier entrance. However!!!! It didnt matter at all! Coz.... *breaks out in giggles* i got to see Jon. NOT far far away, but he was only like a HUG away. The best part was : HE SMILED AT ME! gosh... I couldn't ask for more =D. Just a few weeks ago, I wished that I could meet him again. AND MY WISH CAME TRUE! But this time, I couldnt get his autograph. =( no photos and no hugs. ARGH~ Perhaps I over-reacted; he's just any human being with music talents. Thats all~~~

~^-^~

Alright! Other than "thee highlight of the night", I saw quite alot of TCS celebs and Fly Entertianment Artistes. Like Zoe Tay & husband, Wang Bi Ren & husband, Pan Ling Ling & husband, Ivy Li Jing Mei & daugther, Mok Xiao Ling, Phyllis Quek & Bernard Lim, MICHELLE YEOH!, Kym Ng, Guo Liang, Bryan Wong, Quan Yi Feng, lots of cute ang mos and Minster Vivian B. & wife, JON JON JON! (this is damn random), the singer/actor of Dreamz FM.. blah blah blah. Perhaps Ive got "that" smile, I was soooo lucky to be at the premier entrance! *shuanghan; i need that chance to see JON! heeeee* THANKS to Scott & Yuxian for letting me stand in that "strategic place" Scott Lim ... my 1st friend with such a name and it reminded me of Scott Moffatt =)

~^-^~

Now I know, smiling can be DAMN tiring. But its all worth it. Im not complaining =)

~^-^~

Actually I got a pair of VIP passes to this musical. But Id be working tml. so... arh.. i shall award someone who really deserves it =) Im having a BAD headache now. I have to wait till my hair dries before I hit the pillows.

~^-^~

Good Night~

~^-^~

*diary, honestly... i thought of asking dms.. (i dun wanna lie to you) But i have to work. However I was thinking, if he could bring me there to watch the show, id call in sick (what the hell right, im such biatch!) Ahh.. this would be such a great date huh!!!.... Sadly, some things when are already kept in the old cupboard, it should remain there.

~^-^~

Im happy, even though Im just a plain Jane! Yahooooo~~~~ and i saw and smelt BEAUTIFUL dark red wine coloured roses today! the feeling is awesome and beyond words describable.

pissed and irritated

2006-11-02T22:04:00.000+08:00

Tonight, I was harassed by this stupid Nigerian guy. (Bloodie Helllll). This bugger wanted to get my number and said he wanna meet me again. WTF? DO I look like a whore to YOU?! Well, in the 1st place, YOU MR BUGGER have really lousy hookup lines. AND! YOU made me MISS MY BUS! and I WILL NOT forgive you because YOU MADE ME PAY 65cents JUST to flee from your intolerable nonsense.

@>----

OKAY. what made me so mad is what he said. Come on if a lady refuses to give you her number; you either 1) BE a gentleman and LEAVE HER ALONE! 2) Coax her (Its not that I wanted to be coaxed BUT its logical rite???) AND NOT give turnoff comments. Now this PEA-BRAIN Nigerian guy, obviously do not understand the culture in Spore. Hey! Even in America, LADIES have the right to say NO dude! Given a liberated society, FEMALES have a say man. YOU're such an impossible human being who needs to be rid of your MALE hormones! Oh yes, and I need to add that JUST BECAUSE we are Asians, we do NOT sleep around like you think. If you thought I was an easy and brainless prey.. OH MAN YOU REALLY GOT THE WRONG GIRL. I was nearly about to kick you in the nuts or scream if you had followed me up the bus.

@>----

So girls, please heed my advice. Ya, its okay to exchange a "Hi! & How are you?" with friendly strangers BUT not pple like him. He should just get his ego changed. Was trying to cool myself with Peter Andre's number. Ah~~~ Mysterious Girl. Ooooooo~ this song ABSOLUTELY makes me high. haha!

@>----

I had this memory flashback. I remembered I was bullied in Poly Yr1 while I was helping out during the Enrolment. This bugger (a male) was spewing vulgarities and complains at me just because he was unhappy with SPSU and I WAS from SPSU. (he should also eat sh*t and die, anyways HE got a serious warning from his In-Charge. Thanks to Zahid, Iskandar and my fellow GLs!) What made me smile was that DMS nearly wanted to beat up that bugger! Coz he was staring hard at him and I could see he was already clenching his fist. I had to practically LUG him away! Now, that was sweet and a lovely memory. =)

@>----

I also remembered someone told me that he will marry me if we were still single at 30 years old. LOL! sounds like a little boy making a promise to a little girl huh? This was sweet too =)

@>----

Im feeling better already heeee*

@>----

Ahhhhh, this week is hell..... and next week its gonna be worse. I yearn for December's arrival.

Finally Home

2006-10-30T21:39:00.000+08:00

Baby, You finally came home.

You've met rough days.

But there's no need to fear.

Coz you are now here.

I missed you the whole time.

Its like a pain and disease.

That holds my breath.

But you are now here.

Baby, Ive always kept my ground.

Waiting for your return.

Will be the last tribute to my love.

So glad you're back.

Ive held my heart all these years.

And darling, my hands are tired.

Before I leave you.

I wanna tell you; I love you.

And baby, I always will.

So this is hugs and goodbye.

Im bleeding and I have to go.

But you are now here.

And thats all that matters.

~inspired by jessica's i belong to me~

Girl, I am so proud of you!

2006-10-28T22:17:00.000+08:00

har~ ahhem hem. I damn proud of myself. For doing 7 tours today including 5 tours back to back which meant I TALKED non-stop for 5 hrs~ (voice's a little hoarse) and for getting a record-breaking amount of ____ .

Perhaps Ive worked too much/too long, i dun feel well. ahhh~ wat to do, im addicted to saving. helen wants me to go watch sinking of japan with her. and maybe i shd. its nice to go out with my girly frens too!

my reports/assignments are up to my neck now. daddy, give me the strength and courage to reach the end of the term. I need all the energy and favour I can get I have to be healthy!

2 smiles: given & taken

2006-10-27T21:55:00.000+08:00

short sweet post

2 things made me smile

--> a "lovely" delivery & an sms from australia (its not from grace or DMS)

p/s: DMS, are you back yet? or still watching the weather? -.-

.......and I made 2 other smile

--> my grandma & my hamster

I forgot that its Friday Night; the night where most couply frens go out and have fun.

For once, Id like to sleep early and forget about the world. And perhaps tml Id start chasing cars. NO, chasing DUCKS.

Posted this song called Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol. Jon did his version and the judges had nothing but praise. He brought the story out and I felt every word of it.

how to you spell?

2006-10-26T21:07:00.000+08:00

Nowadays, Blogging to Alaskie is pure relieve of boredom. (correction: ahhem, it should be procrastination.)

I sit on my bed, in my room and in front of my notebook (fondly known as pilot). Im comfy and all but im turning all cold. My mind often runs into metal blocks which get really annoying at times. I cant think properly!

I got scared for one single reason today. I have too many things I want to do yet I only have time to do a few. Blame it on that "P" word. And when I finally have the time to do the less important things, Im totally washed out. TO be honest, i go through my nights sitting in front of pilot like a zombie. AND msn is starting to irritate the crap outta me. I dunno why. (cept for talking to some pple like b2. he makes me laugh.) <- i wrote that to make you smile =)

I figured I needed a new world to SEE, EXPLORE and get KINKED. Sick of old repetitive stuff and this obedient-r/shipless-lifestyle. *eh? am i complaining?* yea man~ I need to constantly remind myself that I LIVE MY F**KING LIFE TO HOW I F**KING LIKE. Geddit? Stand my ground and won't back down?

My red notebook is getting thinner. which says 2006 is ending soon. Hell yes! and it means my papers/reports/projects/presentations are swimming rapidly towards me a full speed. At this point of time, my vgrts are like water; spewing into the Singapore River from the Merlion's mouth at the Merlion Park. non-stop.

I beg you to put me in Uganda, Ethiopia, Africa or even Zambawee. To shut me up and open my eyes, mouth and ears. More importantly the heart wants to be liberated & inspired!!!

I should change places/lives with someone for one day maybe. perhaps that might help in the short run. Any takers? Swap bodies with me for one day?

jonathan leong

2006-10-25T16:59:00.001+08:00

Close your eyes when you watch this. [Not that he's too painful to look at! HE's a hottie actually!] I did that for the 1st time and my "insides" melted. I thought he's a great singer! (both Hady & Jon deserved to be in the finals) Pardon him for his cheesy moves ^-^ everyone's got their 1st time getting out of the old cupboard. Try dancing when you have "four left feet"!

.jon.jon.jon.jon.jon.

Jon - Smooth *SCREAMS*

I know this entry long overdue ever since the Singpore Idol 2006 fever few weeks back. I was really hyped while working at SIS. Gosh bands like Electrico and Don & Drew rocked the house! Man, when Jon came out to perform, he ____________ *speechless*. I thought the crowd suddenly came alive. Needless to say I was dazzled.

.jon.jon.jon.jon.jon.

Daddy, I have one small request? Pls make Jonathan bump into me on the streets so I can get his autograph ^-^ and OF COZ grab his arm and squeeze in a picture heeeeeee* BUT IF ANYONE of you see him on the streets, pls get his autograph for me okay? Hahaha!

.jon.jon.jon.jon.jon.

This is for my GL buddy. Cheer up alritey? I know your reading this and erm Id try to think of something worth smiling for you ^-^ Avalanche Always!

Hari Raya

2006-10-24T13:27:00.000+08:00

Happy Hari Raya To All my Muslim Friends~ Go Wild! Coz its YouR DaY!

I was surprised when Raymond called me at 1030PM last night! Ahhhh, and was asked to work today. Some poor soul must be sick~ Raymond is this guy from SIS with cute ears sticking out and he nv fails to make me smile.

..:: thats the way uhur uhur I like it ::..

Aftermath of The Race

2006-10-22T23:18:00.001+08:00

Ever fear your rib cage's gonna collaspe on you everytime you try to cough or sneeze? Or cringing with pain when you walk up and down a flight of steps? How about sitting down and standing up? I deserved all of it. But somehow I wished God would make my aches less painful, coz I really feel like crying whenever I move. *heaves a long sigh*

My dad was the best! I guess he tried to cheer me up by bringing the whole family to eat my favourite steamboat. (recalls; left alone and worked ydae while my family went to Msia) Dad was in SG coz he had work to do. So we went for dinner together. Coz he said 2 pple was too little to have a steamboat ydae so he brought us there for dinner! ^-^ Thank you papa~ Not forgetting eve & jie (thank you for calling me ydae & today *smiles*)

When I came back home, I was so happy that I could grab a quick shower and enjoy a korean show on tele just in time. I was beginning to like the plot just before I felt that my life was somewhat replayed in that show. It not the whole part, just one tiny bit. And all of a sudden I froze and my tear ducts started swelling. Let me remind Daddy that its already coming to the end of October. In fact, its the 22nd. I began to query why certain issues in my life are hard to handle and leave me feeling helpless sometimes. Yup, life is wonderful yet not it doesnt show you any mercy. The clock ticks and the sun comes up from the east again: A new day will have to start.

I chanced upon this song afew weeks ago. And it has been on my repeat track for almost 2 days now. Twas a hit sometime back. Was it in 2000? When I was sweating over the Big "O"s? Clueless. Anyhow, its a great comforting song most suited for a mood like today. Honestly I felt I must be the biggest pahbol in the whole wide world. Here you go: Uncle Kracker - Follow Me

*guitar stwangs; you don't know how you met me you dun know why. You cant turn around and say goodbye. All you know is when Im with you I make you free. And swim through your veins like the fish in sea* how sweetly he sings ^-^